Sunday, September 30, 2007

Break out the Eye Bleach

Age of Hooper (The)


1. A herd of hairy bearded mountain sasquatches descended on Washington this week...

2. Despite having only one eye and one tooth between them, they still tried to enjoy the flag-burning and other festivities.

3. Former U.S. Attorneys are outraged at their reduced status as Hillary '08 interns.

4. In a proper and decent world, these buffalo-wh0-walk-as-men would be sent to Club Gitmo to menstruate on detainees. Al Qaeda would collapse within hours.

5. Howard Stern has really let himself go.

Best of Whacko
"Ladies, I'm not sure this is going to induce someone to stop and help us change the tire on the truck."

Best of Submariner
"Double, double, Code Pink trouble,
Bra's get burned and caldron's bubble..."

Best of Army of Mom
Watch as Clint and Stacy's heads explode on the next episode of "What not to wear."

Best of Robert
You think our breasts are bad, just wait til we come back wearing lycra bicycle shorts!

Best of Silhouette
"Did we remember to bring the tambourine? Oh good, we wouldn't want to look foolish."

Best of Jay Guevara/Submariner
This is the picture Eli Lilly distributes to doctors to help treat those "cases of erection lasting more than four hours."

Best of Shayne
"Mom?"

Best of curly
♫ Boob sweat -- Bomber jet -- Blood for oil,
Ron Paul -- Hillary – My hat’s tin foil. ♪

Best of attmay
I think I just went from gay to incredibly mega-gay.

Best of Son Of The Godfather
Off-camera: Dian Fossey and Jane Goodall taking notes

Best of sonicfrog
I haven't seen this many dough rolls since I worked at the bakery.

Best of Steve-O
On the front side:
WAR IS INDECENT

On the back side:
BUT NOT BY COMPARISON

48 comments:

Whacko said...

"Ladies, I'm not sure this is going to induce someone to stop and help us change the tire on the truck."

Double the U said...

TAKE A STAND AGAINST... UMMM, hey what are we protesting here today?

dickey swollenz said...

in a related story, 'bombs' have gained 3 percentage points against 'breasts'

Submariner said...

With advance apologies to the Bard:

Double, double, Code Pink trouble,
Bra's get burned and caldron's bubble...

Submariner said...

Only a 3/4 ton pick-up for transport? Groups of genus bovine are usually carted in a cattle trailer - I'm just sayin'...

Submariner said...

Almost enough to make a straight man turn all Johnny Weir.
Almost.
Hurry up Thursday!

Army of Mom said...

Urp. I'm sorry. I just threw up a little in my mouth.

Army of Mom said...

The new commercial for Secret deoderant: Strong enough for a man, but made for a woman. It even works on the goatee-sporting dyke in the middle!

Army of Mom said...

The new commercial for the anti-Axe deoderant body spray. Repels hags and smelly liberal hippies with saggy boobs.

Army of Mom said...

Tim Gunn: This just really isn't working for me. You really should try to hide your flaws instead of flaunt them.

Army of Mom said...

Watch as Clint and Stacy's heads explode on the next episode of "What not to wear."

Army of Mom said...

Sally wondered why the paint was peeling off her silver sedan until a breeze wafted by and she caught a whiff of the smelly sisters.

Army of Mom said...

The Smelly Sisters got beligerent when a homeless guy tossed a couple of dimes in the tambourine and asked them to put their tops back on.

Army of Mom said...

Torture is indecent? That is the pot calling the kettle black. Will someone please gouge out my eyeballs?

Robert said...

You think our breasts are bad, just wait til we come back wearing lycra bicycle shorts!

Robert said...

It's pictures like this that keep me gay.

Anonymous said...

Seriously, what would they say if we forced Gitmo detainees to look at their picture?

(and looking at it really is torturous...)

Silhouette said...

"Did we remember to bring the tambourine? Oh good, we wouldn't want to look foolish."

Anonymous said...

changing hearts and minds...that maybe the Taliban has a point about the proper role of women...

Jay Guevara said...

Eli Lilly rolled out its antidote for Viagra overdoses.

metalgarth said...

Bob Guiccione's attempt at affirmative action in his magazine was even more puzzling than his Golden Showers fascination in the 1990's.

Shayne said...

Geez, Goat-Boy has really let himself go!

Shayne said...

"Mom?"

Anonymous said...

Last night I thought I got to second base with the one on the right, but it was only back fat.

Steve O

curly said...

"Little pig, little pig, let the evil racist right wing Christian Bushitler/blood for oil/Cheney-Haliburton/homophobic/transphobic/Islamophobic/baby killer bombs come in.”

"Not by the hair on my chinny chin chin."

curly said...

“Yes Alex. I’ll take ‘Hardcore lesbos with undoubtedly bigger clenises than the Hilldog’s’ for $400.”

curly said...

ORA: "I've got more firecrackers if you've got more hamsters."

Anonymous said...

Signs seen at the counter-protest:

ENVY THE BLIND

ENVY THE DEAD

WAS IS ALMOST AS INDECENT

DECENCY IS... A VERY LARGE SWEATER

Anonymous said...

Mommy!

That woman swallowed my boogie-board!!

Steve O

Anonymous said...

Of course, these women are not sexy to Europeans... but only because they shaved their armpits.

Steve O

Anonymous said...

Must...look...away... argh!!!

Steve O

curly said...

♫ Boob sweat -- Bomber jet -- Blood for oil,
Ron Paul -- Hillary – My hat’s tin foil. ♪

attmay said...

I think I just went from gay to incredibly mega-gay.

Submariner said...

In cases of erections lasting for more than four hours, forget seeing a doctor right away; just stare at this picture.

Submariner said...

Moments later, a group of newly-arrived counter-protesters were hauled away by the police for an honest mistake: they started throwing harpoons.

Submariner said...

Thank Gaia nobody could exclaim "Thar she blows!" for cause...

Son Of The Godfather said...

Where's Dian Fossey and Jane Goodall?

curly said...

Dear Penthouse Forum Magazine,

While I have enjoyed your letters about swinging with bearded, tattooed, fat, ugly, smelly, sagging breasted Boobs Not Bombs beasts, I never thought it would happen to me…

sonicfrog said...

I haven't seen this many dough rolls since I worked at the bakery.

sonicfrog said...

Hey, the good folks in Enumclaw finally found something even they find obscene!!!

sonicfrog said...

What, are they make ANOTHER sequel of "The Blob"???

Submariner said...

Ed Woods remakes "When Worlds Collide."

sonicfrog said...

Oh.the picture disappeared, thank GOD!!!

Anonymous said...

On the front side:
WAR IS INDECENT

On the back side:
BUT NOT BY COMPARISON

Steve O

Kaptain said...

You know how I've always said, "More is better"? I take it back. I take it all back.

Kaptain said...

I think this is God getting back at me for trying to always see women naked. God's like, "So, you wanna see naked women, huh? Well, here you go!"

Submariner said...

When did they film the remake of "The Fly" using hippos?

Anonymous said...

You! Middle Gorgon! Comb your goatee, the cameras are watching!