A Right-Wing Christian Second-Rate Pr0n Blog
Friday, August 17, 2007
Warning, May Cause Blindness or Teh Ghey
1. "The bubbles stopped five minutes ago. How much longer are you going to keep that foot on Elizabeth Hasselback's head?"
2. "FEMA still wants you to hold off on diving in until they can post tsunami warnings."
3. If Free Willy mated with Ted Kennedy ...
4. "See? I told you the bow would split apart if you put your fat a$$ on the stern."
5. "Hey, Rosio, I know you're bummed about the Jenna Bush engagement, but c'mon... did you really think you had a chance with her?"
Best of Submariner
After swallowing, Orca swam back to the boat and hacked up a Rosie on the stern...
Best of Submariner
A split second later, the pleasure craft took the same aspect as the Titanic late in the movie and slipped into the lake, stern down.
Best of Son Of The Godfather
I hope Pinnocchio escapes from in there.
Best of Son Of The Godfather
"How they hangin', old chum?"
Best of Son Of The Godfather
That's pretty sweet of Rosie, blocking her child from the harmful influence of the sun.
Best of Son Of The Godfather
Has Disney modified the Jungle Book ride so the attacking hippo actually jumps onto the boat?
Best of metalgarth
Jabba the Hut and one of his slave girls take a trip to Waterworld in yet another ill conceived sci-fi crossover.
Best of Jack Reacher
"Let's go, kid. Make sure you dump the spare cinder blocks overboard. I guess Mr. Bob Barker discovered there's a downside to f***ing with me."
Best of Anonymous
...and when the stars were right, Great Cthulhu rose from the depths of sunken R'lyeh. He then took one look at Rosie and swam the hell back to the ocean floor.
Best of duke of red
Wow, Lesbian with wet T-shirt actually fits, but it's soooo misleading.
Best of captainobvious
OH, THE HUGE MANATEE!
Best of Son Of The Godfather
"Hey mom, that's weird... I've never seen sharks actually swim away before..."
Best of David Simon
"I don't understand, mommy. If you can't swim, why did you keep telling Ms. Electra that you wanted to go for a dive?"
Best of curly
“OK sweetie; I’ll lift my shirt and you scrape the barnacles off my back.”
Best of curly
“Wow Mommy! That last queef split the boat in half!”
Best of Double the U
Wow Mommy (or are you Daddy) it is funny how all the fish die when you stick your feet in the water.
Update: Demotivatored
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93 comments:
See Mom, even the sharks don't want to go near you.
When Chad and his friends heard about lesbians doing a wet t-shirt contest, this happened to be the last thing they expected.
Well at least it's not a 'Boobs Not Outboards' photo.
Is it still Thursday?
Great, here it is almost the weekend, and now I gotta go gouge my eyes out...
After swallowing, Orca swam back to the boat and hacked up a Rosie on the stern...
A split second later, the pleasure craft took the same aspect as the Titanic late in the movie and slipped into the lake, stern down.
Where is Captain Ahab when you need him?
Curly said...
Well at least it's not a 'Boobs Not Outboards' photo.
Although it DOES have a boob in the place of an outboard...
Call me Ishmael...
Flashing back to my previous life, what I wouldn't give for a MK 48 and a firing point solution!
I hope Pinnocchio escapes from in there.
By posting the most anti-Hot-Babe-Thursday-pic ever directly adjacent to the picture of nekkid Carmen Electra, V the K rips through the fabric of space/time and inadvertently discovers a shortcut to the Delta quadrant.
"How they hangin', old chum?"
Shirt: "012009... But I'm trying to lose weight."
Shirt: "01-20-09... Finally, a chance for a lesbian president."
Already used on the Brittany cap, but...
"You're gonna need a bigger boat."
"Kobe, I'm..."
Sorry, couldn't complete the cap without tasting a little vomit at the back of my mouth.
(OJA)
Shave the Whales
I thought seacows had whiskers... Oh, there they are.
If she mated with a jellyfish, would the offspring be Jelly-Belly-fish?
I didn't know they made lifevests that went under your t-shirt.
Girl Thought Bubble: "One foot closer to the motor, you fat load, and I'm sittin on a cool 50 mil."
Rosie: "I've trolled for fish using my feet for bait like this for years."
Girl: "I guess that that would make you a Master Baiter."
(captcha: igpny -- nearly pig latin)
Wow, black is slimming.
Mornin' Rodney.
"Thar she bloats!"
'Ow to speak Australian: "anchor"
'lo SOTG
"All aboard the HMS PMS!"
Cap This Classic:
How nature says "Do Not Touch."
Mornin' SOTG/RD
Where are the water-C.H.U.D.s when you really need them?
Hey Subby!
Rumor has it that Spielberg's filming a sequel to Jaws. This publicity still kinda confirms it'll be the scariest yet.
That's pretty sweet of Rosie, blocking her child from the harmful influence of the sun.
Usually, picturing hot, lesbo action is stimulating...
Usually.
Miss O'Donuts; the EPA called and said you can no longer roll into the water - something about a coastline protection court order?
A tyke and a dyke.
Almost made me appreciate Andrew Sullivan's preferences, 'til I looked back to Thursday...
A cute kid and an gi-normous squid.
You know, there's an AC/DC song titled "A Whole Lotta Rosie"... I get it now.
Old Joke Alert?:
After a vigorous bout of lovemaking, Rosie cleans off all the flour.
There goes that vomit again.
DRUDGEBREAKING: Tsunami warnings have been issued along the Pacific seaboard this morning...
Has Disney modified the Jungle Book ride so the attacking hippo actually jumps onto the boat?
Jabba the Hut and one of his slave girls take a trip to Waterworld in yet another ill conceived sci-fi crossover.
Riffin' on Cab Calloway:
Ahoy-Ahoy-Ahoy-de-Ho!
The more things change department:
In ancient Greek mythos, young virgins were sacrificed to appease the hungers of the Kracken.
As we can see in the attack above, Hollywood has reinstituted the concept...
Bill Nye: "And that proves scientifically that lard floats."
"Lemme know when you're ready to move off the stern, Mom, so I can reposition some ballast."
"Let's go, kid. Make sure you dump the spare cinder blocks overboard. I guess Mr. Bob Barker discovered there's a downside to f***ing with me."
Later that day numerous marine mammals were found to have beached themselves, vomited, and died.
News article: Judge rules Navy can not use sonar for war games near California coast, as it may harm whales. On hearing the decision, Rosie broached repeatedly in celebration.
...and when the stars were right, Great Cthulhu rose from the depths of sunken R'lyeh. He then took one look at Rosie and swam the hell back to the ocean floor.
Suddenly a pod of dolphins began attacking the huge mammal at the stern, only stopping once they came to the realization that it WASN'T an orca.
"Look Mommy, those orcas want to play with you!"
"Crikey!" Steve thought to himself, "I've ALWAYS been able to find the beauty in ANY member of the animal kingdom, before... I'll never say that again!"
Wow, Lesbian with wet T-shirt actually fits, but it's soooo misleading.
Wow, Michael Moore has really let himself go.
This one sorta puts a kink in you rperiscope, eh submariner?
all I gots to say is...
"I hope that is NOBODY'S prom date"
I cant believe they are already remaking tommy boy.
ro ro ro your bloat.
Who’s the fat guy?
Looks like smuggling calves under a wet tarp.
Somebody shoot it - it’s going to eat the child!
Moby Ick
Moby Dyke
I didn’t know Ron Jeremy took up fishing…
Who pulled the industrial tire from the sea?
btw, as a die hard extreme leftist, that boat is certainly solar powered or otherwise offset, no?
OH, THE HUGE MANATEE!
Hey I was hoping you would post this....
Manatee, or man in tee?
Luckily, the reaction of test audience for The Deep convinced the studio to go with Jacqueline Bisset instead.
SpongeBarb Stretchpants
Only Rosie could inspire the makers of a wetsuit to have an expiration date.
I change my previous cap entry to:
SpongeNob Stretchpants
...I think it works better. :)
"Hey mom, that's weird... I've never seen sharks actually swim away before..."
"Manatee, or man in tee"
that was a double entendre. think about it.
...and that was how scientists discovered that sharks actually avoid high-fat foods.
An unfortunate multicultural misunderstanding occurred when some Native Americans attempted to club what they thought was a walrus for its hide and blubber.
"I don't understand, mommy. If you can't swim, why did you keep telling Ms. Electra that you wanted to go for a dive?"
I realize that lesbians aren't all that discriminating. But is anyone really surprised that Rosie's Family Cruise has been pared down to a pontoon boat?
After leaving The View, Rosie O'Donnell prepares to return to her natural habitat.
"Thanks for the surprise honey. But when you overheard me say that I like fish...well, nevermind."
"Can we have one meal where you don't eat everything, Rosie? I'm going to shrivel away to nothing if you keep this up." "Oh shut up Kelli."
Correction: Rosie and Kelli are vacationing in Lesbos.
"When are we going fishing, Mommie?"
"Fishing?"
"Sure - how else are we gonna catch some more of that 'sea bass' I heard you tellin' Auntie Ellen that you love to eat?"
SOTG,
Or
SpongeBlob Stretchpants
Son Of The Godfather said...
A tyke and a dyke.
Gonna take more than a finger to plug the hole in that dyke.
Poster child for the Marine Mammals Protection Act or Prima Fascia case for the resumption of unlimited whaling, you decide.
Chairperson of the Organization of Rotund Cetacean Americans.
Twixt those thighs lie a black hole so vast that it leads to a parallel universe.
...errr not going there.
Muff Divers – the advanced class.
wv = fggsx...Fag sex? Why the constant references to John Edwards?
Rosie’s out to prove that she has a bigger gash than the space shuttle Endeavour.
Endeavour? Damn near sank ‘er!
“OK sweetie; I’ll lift my shirt and you scrape the barnacles off my back.”
“Wow Mommy! That last queef split the boat in half!”
“…and the lucky winner of the Lesbian Wet Tarp Contest is: contestant number 012009!”
“No Mom, they’re whale watchers, not paparazzi.”
Wow Mommy (or are you Daddy) it is funny how all the fish die when you stick your feet in the water.
"Behold, children: the majestic Whale."
mom, I told you the sea water won't quit your tattoos
What, no "fatwa" jokes?
Guys, we're slipping here!
Tall and tan and young and lovely
It's painfully obvious that Rosie ain't from Ipanema!
Rodney Dill said...
SOTG,
Or
SpongeBlob Stretchpants
Yup, that's the one! well done.
Fare thee well Titanic
ROFLMAO
I just finally got Caption Obvious' Hindenberg reference with
OH THE HUGE MANATEE
probably 'cause Rosie as a Huge Manatee is a funny enough thought on its own.
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