Thursday, July 26, 2007

Twin Driver Side Airbags


1. "Damn! No Parking anywhere near Hillary Campaign HQ, and I'm already late for 'Breasts Not Bombs!'"

2. "Ask me why I've never gotten a speeding ticket... EVER!"

3. "Reinforced titanium buttons my ass."

4. "Must... drive... faster... drug-crazed... Lindsey Lohan... gaining..."

5. "No, just spectacular."

Best of Submariner
"On Star; are you alright? We have visual on air bag deployment..."

Best of Submariner
I also prefer the Bactrian to the Dromedary. A fine choice, V., but perhaps next time you can show the "toe" as well?

Best of The Man
Senate Democrats, led by Ted Kennedy, issued a subpoena VtheK to get him to reveal his source for Thursday pictures.

Best of Double the U
I know I remembered to unplug the coffee maker, I remembered to turn off the hot water heater, I remembered to leave enough food for the cat, WHAT THE HELL did I forget this morning?

Best of Son Of The Godfather
I think I'm going to enjoy the remake of Buck Rogers in the 25th Century.

Best of Son Of The Godfather
"Hey Subby, your prom dates are here."

Best of Son Of The Godfather
"It's 106 miles to Chicago, we got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark, and I'm wearing my 14 year old sister's 4-sizes-too-small shirt."
"Hit it."

Best of jbinnout
Why, yes, I am aware that there are speed bumps every 50 feet. Now speed up!

Best of Rodney Dill
"Damn washboard roads."

Best of Submariner
♪Thanks for the mammories...♪

Best of whacko
By using a new spokes model for their otherwise mundane Taurus, Ford increased sales and managed to turn a profit in the second quarter.

Best of jbinnout
No, honest, I swear. It wasn't me! It's these damn leather seats!

Best of SnarkyOne
Pam Anderson was left speechless with rage and jealousy and vowed revenge by getting an even bigger pair.
Then she toppled over.

38 comments:

Submariner said...

"On Star; are you alright? We have visual on air bag deployment..."

Submariner said...

I also prefer the Bactrian to the Dromedary. A fine choice, V., but perhaps next time you can show the "toe" as well?

Submariner said...

'minds me of that scene in Gumball Rally where Adrienne Barbeau gets out of the speeding ticket be lowering the zipper in her jumpsuit. I'm just sayin'...

The Man said...

Senate Democrats, led by Ted Kennedy, issued a subpoena VtheK to get him to reveal his source for Thursday pictures.

The Man said...

Ted Kennedy's staff hired him a new driver, one that will float if needed.

The Man said...

Mr. Edwards, we are late to the 'fund raiser' at Sully's house, for the last time I will not pull over at any rest stop on the way.

Whacko said...

Thought bubble: "With my new surgically-enhanced boobs, I may never have to work another day in my life! Wonder where I can find another nasty old rich man like Anna Nicole did?"

Double the U said...

I know I remembered to unplug the coffee maker, I remembered to turn off the hot water heater, I remembered to leave enough food for the cat, WHAT THE HELL did I forget this morning?

Son Of The Godfather said...

Giggitty-Gi... *splat* I'm done.

Son Of The Godfather said...

I think I'm going to enjoy the remake of Buck Rogers in the 25th Century.

Son Of The Godfather said...

Technically, you're never supposed to wear a seatbelt like that... you could break a rib. Of course the same could be said when getting double-D funbags installed.

Son Of The Godfather said...

Rodney Dill: "Ma'am, I'm not sure what you're trying to do with your right hand there, but I am NOT that kinda guy!"
*ZIP*
"O.K., now I'm that type of guy."

Son Of The Godfather said...

"Hey Subby, your prom dates are here."

Son Of The Godfather said...

"Yeah guys, she's the hottest Fembot™ I've ever owned, but wouldn't ya know, she still drives shitty like the real thing!"

*ducks and runs for cover*

Son Of The Godfather said...

"It's 106 miles to Chicago, we got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark, and I'm wearing my 14 year old sister's 4-sizes-too-small shirt."

"Hit it."

Son Of The Godfather said...

"Look at those idiot skateboarders jumping the curb over there..."
"What a couple of boobs."
"Why thank you!"

With acknowledgement to Mel Brooks.

Son Of The Godfather said...

Someone's car didn't come with cupholders...

Son Of The Godfather said...

"Thanks for stopping... Those Muslim cab drivers wouldn't let me in the taxi with my seeing eye dog here... That means I'm blind and am NOT intensly focused on your insanely massive love pillows. No sir, not watching them jiggle. Can't do it. blind as a bat."

jbinnout said...

As your driving instructor, I insist we practice parallel parking over and over until we get it right.

Son Of The Godfather said...

Why buy the cow, when you can... Oh never mind.

jbinnout said...

Why, yes, I am aware that there are speed bumps every 50 feet. Now speed up!

jbinnout said...

Global warming...it's a beautiful thing.

Jack Reacher said...

Disclaimer: Vehicle shown with optional equipment. Professional boobs--do not attempt. Not all purchasers will qualify for 42DD financing.

sonicfrog said...

She's flying to out tomorrow to help feed the starving children in Africa.... All 15 million of 'em!!!

Rodney Dill said...

"Damn washboard roads."

Submariner said...

I'll bet she gets hand-frisked whenever she flies. I'm just sayin'...

Submariner said...

The model for the bra scene in "Everything You Always Wanted To Know About Sex" was stopped today for tailgating. Woody was right; they do "...usually run in pairs."

Double the U said...

Wow, looks like who ever took the picture is out for a nice smooth ride.

Submariner said...

Benny's Hills.

jeff said...

Miss Wilcox was the most popular teacher at daycare...

How to identify her husband and children: look for stretch marks around the mouth.

Submariner said...

♪Thanks for the mammories...♪

whacko said...

By using a new spokes model for their otherwise mundane Taurus, Ford increased sales and managed to turn a profit in the second quarter.

jbinnout said...

No, honest, I swear. It wasn't me! It's these damn leather seats!

Submariner said...

Obviously too shapely for Bubba. Hillary on the other hand...

Submariner said...

♪ The hills are alive, and I'm damn glad they are...♪

Submariner said...

Y'know, if Julie Andrews had looked like this, there'd a been a WHOLE different meaning to "Climb Every Mountain." I'm just sayin'...

Anonymous said...

"Like, they're called boobs, eh?"

"Like, most women wear them INSIDE their clothes, eh?"

Steve O

SnarkyOne said...

Pam Anderson was left speechless with rage and jealousy and vowed revenge by getting an even bigger pair.

Then she toppled over.