Saturday, June 16, 2007

We Interrupt Our Normal Saturday Wholesome Americana to Bring You a Terror-fag Crawling Through an X-Ray Machine

1. Ever since the TSA was unionized, they just don't give a damn.

2. Dale Gribble took his Dallas-Fort Worth Airport cockroach contract very seriously indeed.

3. Meanwhile, the x-ray scanner proved that the spiked metal dildo Arafat had used on him at age 10 was still lodged in his bunghole.

4. The good news is, the x-ray scanner killed most of the terror-fag's body lice.

5. ORA: "Damn you Jackie Brown!"

6. The UN and the ISM thought helping terror-fags recreate their births would lead to enhanced self-esteem and a lowered proclivity for violence.

7. "It's dark and hot inside and it smells like the worst sulfur pits of hell ... but enough about my memories of Arafat's rectum. Get me the hell out of here.

8. "Well, this sucks. Now I'll never make my connection in Atlanta."

9. After the Flying Imams won their lawsuit, CAIR decided to push the envelope even further.

10. Drat! The Infidel Machine has snagged the red hankie in my left pocket.

Best of Whacko
"Excuse me sir, but TSA regulations require that you remove all headgear before passing throught the X-ray machine. I'll have to ask to you remove your ski mask and go through again."

Best of Double the U
The screeners were too busy strip searching a 90-year-old woman in a wheelchair to notice this guy getting through.

Best of Son Of The Godfather
"Yup, Mubarra, that's a gerbil up there all right..."

Best of Son Of The Godfather
"That's fine sir, but you'll have to empty the sippy-cup... no liquids allowed on board."

Best of Jack Reacher
Many terrorists look alike. Please check the tag to confirm you have the right terrorist.

Best of Brad Marston
Bush HAS created more terrorists...with a Xerox machine.

The Man Told Me This Was The Best Pic Ever.

19 comments:

Whacko said...

"Excuse me sir, but ATF regulations require that you remove all headgear before passing throught the X-ray machine. I'll have to ask to you remove your ski mask and go through again."

Targetpractice said...

"Do you have anything to declare?"

"See, I told you it was a real AK and not a 'toy gun.'"

"Fortunately, odds are he's sterile by now."

Double the U said...

The screeners were too busy strip searching a 90-year-old woman in a wheelchair to notice this guy getting through.

Rodney Dill said...

"Uh, you need to check carry-ons of that length sir."

Son Of The Godfather said...

Perfect! Crank the machine up to 11, and watch terrorist-fag glow in the dark!

Son Of The Godfather said...

"Yup, Mubarra, that's a gerbil up there all right..."

Son Of The Godfather said...

"That's fine sir, but you'll have to empty the sippy-cup... no liquids allowed on board."

Son Of The Godfather said...

As Muktada would soon find out, a meat-grinding machine is nothing to f*** around with.

Jack Reacher said...

Many terrorists look alike. Please check the tag to confirm you have the right terrorist.

The airline can not be held responsible for damage to checked terrorists.

Unattended terrorists will be confiscated, and may be destroyed.

Jack Reacher said...

"So, if I go through this thing, Abu, you're saying I can get into Livonia?"

Brad Marston said...

Bush HAS created more terrorists...with a Xerox machine.

Submariner said...

DRUDGEBREAKING:
The New York Times announced today that it had hired a private firm to provide security at its down-town offices.
Developing...

The Man said...

BEEEEEEEEP

Jay Guevara said...

The old "disguise the woodchipper as a baggage X-ray machine" gets 'em every time.

The Man said...

Did someone forget to empty their pockets of change?

The Man said...

US Air better have some halal dining on this flight.

Cybrludite said...

Meanwhile I have to get there an extra hour early & use a special airline approved locking case which gets checked at the counter if I want to bring my AK-47 when I fly somewhere...

Rodney Dill said...

The Al Qaeda "Purity" sheep scent sniffing device is often employed to ascertain if certain reluctant martyrs had already got a start on their 72 virgins.

Kirby L. Wallace said...

Quick! Crank it all the way up to ELEVEN!