Wednesday, May 09, 2007

Baby in a Box


1. Wal-Mart's version of McDonald's Playland did leave a bit to be desired.

2. Britney Spears prepares to ship the youngun for a visitation with K-Fed.

3. Michael J. Fox was overjoyed. "Yes, another package of fresh, young stem cells!"

4. "Senator Clinton? Planned Parenthood just sent you a boxed lunch."

5. By mailing bricks to senate Republicans, the public managed to change their minds about building a border fence. Using a similar strategy to change Rudy's mind on abortion was less successful.

Best of prince of leaves
FedExodus 2:3 -- "And when she could not longer hide him, she took for him an prepostaged ark of corrugated cardboard, and filled it with polystyrene and with biofoam, and put the child therein; and she laid it in the parcel box by the overnight shipper office."

Best of Rodney Dill
The bubble-wrapped ones never seem to come as fresh.

Best of CJ
Justin Timberlake and two producers of Saturday Nite Live were arrested on child molestation charges today...

V-word 'xndsmpig' as in 'exchange a small pig' which may be what is happening in this pic

Best of metalgarth
Alice In Chains songs should never be used as lullabies.

Best of Jack Reacher
Santa, hard of hearing, didn't understand Timmy when he asked for "A babe, nicely stacked," and instead sent a baby, tightly packed.

Best of Lyn Perry
Early test scene for the Matrix pods before they settled on tubes of gooey liquid.

Best of sonicfrog
OK. Who tore off the shipping label. Dammit!!! I STILL don't know where babies come from!!!!

Best of andthenblammo!
"I looked in the box, I said, 'Look at the baby with the cute peanuts!', I ended up doing 5 to 10. Whatta world."

:-P Divine Miss M

26 comments:

Dickey Swollenz said...

Babe of the week... 1 day early

Double the U said...

Once unionized the storks stopped working and just had their union buddies at UPS do their delivering.

jeff said...

Cabbages, storks, sex... bah! Melanie knew the truth about where babies came from. s

Rodney Dill said...

The bubble-wrapped ones never seem to come as fresh.

CJ said...

Justin Timberlake and two producers of Saturday Nite Live were arrested on child molestation charges today...

V-word 'xndsmpig' as in 'exchange a small pig' which may be what is happening in this pic

andthenblammo! said...

"I looked in the box, I said, 'Look at the baby with the cute peanuts!', I ended up doing 5 to 10. Whatta world."

prince of leaves said...

After a successful test of the technique on Junior, it was time to see whether packing peanuts would keep Grandma from getting bedsores, too.

prince of leaves said...

"See, that's the trouble with ordering babes online ...you can never be sure you're getting the right size."

metalgarth said...

Alice In Chains songs should never be used as lullabies.

prince of leaves said...

FedExodus 2:3 -- "And when she could not longer hide him, she took for him an prepostaged ark of corrugated cardboard, and filled it with polystyrene and with biofoam, and put the child therein; and she laid it in the parcel box by the overnight shipper office."

Van Helsing said...

What a great idea. Instead of changing diapers, all you have to do is stir the peanuts around a little when the ones on top get messy.

Jack Reacher said...

The department store Santa, hard of hearing, didn't understand Timmy when he asked for "A babe, nicely stacked," and instead sent a baby, tightly packed.

Cybrludite said...

Um, Amazon.com? Yeah, I'm pretty sure this isn't what I ordered...

Cybrludite said...

Wow, you really can get anything on eBay...

Jonathan said...

♪ I want my babyback, babyback, babyback... ♪

Lyn Perry said...

Early test scene for the Matrix pods before they settled on tubes of gooey liquid.

Lyn Perry said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Lyn Perry said...

Comment, not a caption: If you think about it, this is really a child-endangering camera shoot and the photographer should be reprimanded. My two cents, lgp

sonicfrog said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
sonicfrog said...

OK. Who tore off the shipping label. Dammit!!! I STILL don't know where babies come from!!!!

sonicfrog said...

How mail-order brides reproduce....

sonicfrog said...

... yeah, so when my son was old enough, I sent him packin'....

sonicfrog said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
sonicfrog said...

How Christians would reproduce, if the Pope had his way!

sonicfrog said...

The contents of the package were later returned to the sender due to the following defects: shaken baby syndrome, and kicked baby syndrome, and thrown baby syndrome.... and the UPS driver was later arrested and charged with child abuse.

sonicfrog said...

Hey, don't laugh. The guy who came up with the idea of using the UPS box as a play-pen is now selling them on line and making millions!!!