1. "Finally, on June 24th, 1997, Snuggle the fabric softener Bear, stiffed his dealer for the last time." --- Snuggle, the E! True Hollywood Story.
2. Andrew Sullivan was furious. He had specifically requested Small Curd cottage cheese in his Fantasy Suite at Club K9.
3. "Damn... Cujo was in a mood tonight."
4. "What white Persian cat?"
5. "Rabid? No, that's not our foam and spittle. Keith Olbermann and Chris Matthews were just having a discussion about Dick Cheney."
Best of Submariner
Nope. We haven't seen even ONE guy in a sheep suit, let alone three...
Best of metalgarth
Same thing happens at our house when Dog Whisperer is a rerun
Best of Cybrludite
Hello, is this Emerald Dragon Takeout? Good. Can you connect me to your purchasing department, please?
Best of Jack Reacher
"The master's home! Act casual!"
Best of CJ
"Mistakes were made."
Best of prince of leaves
"Whaddya mean, 'Who's gonna clean up this mess?' You're the one with the two free paws and opposable thumbs!"
Best of Frank_IBC
"...and the last thing the crazy human female said before she stormed out the door, was 'Google it!'"
Hat Tip: Franco IBC
17 comments:
Nope. We haven't seen even ONE guy in a sheep suit, let alone three...
Nancy Pelosi and her bitches on the GOP proposed surge legislation.
Same thing happens at our house when Dog Whisperer is a rerun
Hello, is this Emerald Dragon Takeout? Good. Can you connect me to your purchasing department, please?
Yes, dammit; as a matter of fact we ARE in heat. Ya wanna make somethin' of it?
ORA:
"Yo, Rinny!"
Well! That ought to take care of ♪...pickin' up the field mice and bopping 'em on the head...♪
"As you saw, the prosecution was unable to get the stuffing back into the pillow. If the stuffing don't fit, you must acquit!"
"The master's home! Act casual!"
"cat did it"
"Yup"
"Yup"
"Ditto"
McGruff kept sayin' he was gonna "...knock the stuffin' out of you..." to Rex. Notice who's sittin' calmly in front of the recliner?
Shepherd: "So, it's like, we was all just sittin' around, lickin' our privates for, what, maybe the hundredth time today, when BLOOOFFFF!, Pierre the Poodle just EXPLODES! Dunno how it happened...seriously man...maybe he got him some of that tainted dog food or somethin'..."
You know the dogs found your stash when...
"Whaddya mean, 'Who's gonna clean up this mess?' You're the one with the two free paws and opposable thumbs!"
After rewarding this act of canine petty vandalism with cooing "Ooohs" and "Aaahs", Jim had only himself to blame when, the following week, the dogs chippered the plasma TV and gnawed apart the house's concrete foundation slab.
"...and the last thing the crazy human female said before she stormed out the door, was 'Google it!'"
UN Weapons inspection team looking for Weapons of Mass Destruction.
Hans Blixx was the lead dog.
So much for YOUR plushy fetish...
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