Monday, April 30, 2007
Rudy Tootie Fresh 'n' Frootie
1. "What do you mean Gavin Newsome was the last man to 'handle' this microphone?"
2. "Oh, man, I just can't hold this one in anymore. For the love of God... SOMEBODY PULL MY FINGER!"
3. Soon to be seen on 3,000,000 moonbat blogs with the caption "Sieg Heil."
4. Rudy reacts to seeing an old friend... boning his ex-wife.
5. "And I probably won't confiscate your guns and use them to abort your babies!" Rudy again tries to meet the conservative base halfway.
Best of metalgarth
Randy said "Dawg, you got talent", Paula smiled and did a little dance in her chair. Simon called him a "talentless hack with no future". No one is really sure if Simon meant as a singer or as a serious presidential candidate.
Best of Jonathan
"For the last f##in' time: THIS is my handle and THIS is my spout!"
Best of Jack Reacher
"And then My Pet Goat went waaaaay back in the pasture...hang on, I'm telling a story here..."
Best of Van Helsing
Rudy terrifies voters by describing the sight of Shrillary silhouetted against a full moon as she flies into the White House on her broom.
Best of Double the U
People give me credit for cleaning up the crime in New York city, in reality I just moved the criminals to upstate New York.
Best of Silhouette
"Feelings. Nothing more than feelings."
Best of prince of leaves
"So I walked into the hotel room, not knowing what to expect, and there was Hillary, lying naked on her back on the bear rug, and no kidding, the damn thing came up to HERE!"
Best of Submariner
♪Somewhere, over the f****n' rainbow...♪
Best of Targetpractice
"This is your candidate. This is your candidate with 240 volts running through him. Any questions?"
"Yeah, he's been stuck in that pose ever since Fred Thompson announced his candidacy. We've started using him as a coat rack."
Best of Rodney Dill
"You must be this tall to ride the Italian Stallion."
Best of sonicfrog
"Great Scott"!!! Rudy Giuliani has been cast as Doc Brown in the latest unnecessary Hollywood remake, "Back To The Future".
Best of Rodney Dill
"... and I live in a van down by the river."
Hat Tip: Double U
Source: Yahoo/Roto-Reuters/Lisa Something