Monday, April 02, 2007

Mixed Signals


1. ORA: "If you'll excuse me, I have an appointment in the back seat of a Land Rover with Adam Sandler and Jack Nicholson."

2. If only April 1st had fallen on a Thursday. Alas, alas...

3. "Well, I haven't done TV for a while, but I'd be glad to play Agent Doyle on '24.'"

4. "I'm sorry, this area is reserved for Mr. Frank's interns. If you want the Hillary intern party, follow the girl with the big fish."

5. No one cared when the DALEK (the shadow at right) exterminated this particular human. In fact, there was polite applause.

Best of Jason
I have a lot more respect for Matt Damon as an actress since I found out she has bewbies

Best of Jack Reacher
"Have you met my sister? Freaky chick, tattoos, makes big, weird muffins."

Best of Son Of The Godfather
Isn't this the dude who used to drive the Scooby-Doo Mystery Machine?

Best of Double the U
okay...the other, other pink meat.

Best of Cybrludite
Ve ah here to... BUTCH... you up!

Best of the paperboy
Hey fun boy! Get a room and go play with yourself!

Best of Tomslick
Oh Thteve, you just have to meet my new friend Ipecac.

Best of Occasional Reader
Short and squat and butch and scary
The ??? from Ipanema goes stomping and
As [s]he stomps by
Each man that [s]he stomps by says,
"AHHHHHHH!"

Best of Submariner
The Bourne Transgendercy

Best of Geoffrey
This is the exact picture I had in my head of Goneril

Best of Anonymous
Arafish was overjoyed with his location upon death. When the first of his 72 "virgins" arived, he was overcome with bliss...

Best of Submariner
Now ist ze time at Schprockets vhen ve saunter und sashey...

Best of GOP & College
This is Bob. Bob has bitch tits.

Best of prince of leaves
In some of the out of the way beaches on Ibiza, it's still possible to witness the occasional mermaphrodite coming ashore for a pack of cigs.

Best of Submariner
I don't know, V. What makes you think this is a lass?

Source: Here
Hat Tip: Der Papierjunge

35 comments:

metalgarth said...

In the next X-Men movie, Cyclops will continue to mutate.

Jason said...

I have a lot more respect for Matt Damon as an actress since I found out she has bewbies

Jason said...

ORA (in conjunction with my previous comment): Matt Damon!

jeff said...

A little-known provision of Sharia law...

Verification word: nawwwt (appropriate)

Jack Reacher said...

"Have you met my sister? Freaky chick, tattoos, makes big, weird muffins."

"This is Rosie O'Donnell's property. I was instructed to tell you to leave, and then to fetch her a mimosa and some Twinkies."

Son Of The Godfather said...

Submariner, I told you to stop playing The Crying Game!... :)

Son Of The Godfather said...

Isn't this the dude(?) who used to drive the Scooby-Doo Mystery Machine?

Son Of The Godfather said...

Well Im not dumb but I cant understand
Why she walked like a woman and talked like a man
Oh my lola lo-lo-lo-lo lola lo-lo-lo-lo lola...

Son Of The Godfather said...

We often forget the arguments for wearing a burqa...

Double the U said...

okay...the other, other pink meat.

racerboy said...

Hey, has anyone seen my girlfriend? She's about 5'5, blond, nice smile, likes seafood...

Son Of The Godfather said...

Hermaphrodite
by Stephen Lynch


She's part girl,
she's part boy.
She's got parts everyone can enjoy.

She's got more,
she's got less.
She's got her manhood tucked in her dress.

Is she a mister,
or is she a miss?
Does she stand up when she's taking a piss?
She's my little girl,
yea, she's my little guy.
When I try to please I get poked in the eye.

She wears lace and she wears flannel.
She watches football and the Lifetime Channel.

What's that bulge under her nightie?
It must be hermaphrodite.

Somethings are white,
somethings are black.
Some girls wear make-up,
mine shaves her back.

She is still beautiful,
she is still fine.
It's too bad her package is bigger than mine.

She can't help her imperfections,
she gets jock itch from her yeast infections.
Who stole all my tightie whities?
It must be hermaphrodite.

Yea, hermaphrodite.

sonicfrog said...

Caption rehash:

If this doesn't cure the Reverend Ted Haggard of his homosexual tendencies, then nothing will!!!

sonicfrog said...

WORST..... SEXBOT...... EVER!!!

Cybrludite said...

Ve ah here to... BUTCH... you up!

the paperboy said...

Yet another Rock-n-Roll quote:
"Most times you can't hear em talk, other times you can
All the same old cliches, is it a woman or is it a man?"

And another:
"And he shaved his legs, and he was a she and she said 'hey babe, take a walk on the wild side'"

Hey fun boy! Get a room and go play with yourself!

divine miss m said...

ORA

Girl, if you want to let him know there's steak for dinner, you got to let him hear it sizzle!

Tomslick said...

Oh Thteve, you just have to meet my new friend Ipecac.

Anonymous said...

What a, er, ah, HANDSOME woman...

Grandma always said; "if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all."

Occasional Reader said...

Short and squat and butch and scary
The ??? from Ipanema goes stomping and
As [s]he stomps by
Each man that [s]he stomps by says,
"AHHHHHHH!"

Submariner said...

The Bourne Transgendercy

Submariner said...

Was {s}he kicked off the Fire Island beach for wearing those shades?

mo fo said...

Worst case of man boobs that I ever saw.

In my right hand: the left nut of a right-wing homophobe pig.
In my left hand: the right-sized box to put all of the left’s progressive ideas.

Badly botched beach bitch.

Geoffrey said...

This is the exact picture I had in my head of Goneril

Anonymous said...

Arafish was overjoyed with his location upon death. When the first of his 72 "virgins" arived, he was overcome with bliss...

Submariner said...

Now ist ze time at Schprockets vhen ve saunter und sashey...

Submariner said...

Johnny Weir has really let himself go!

Rodney Dill said...

I didn't know Kevin Bacon had a son... er daughter... er...

Dr.Hardcrab said...

>>>

Brad Pitt was finally forced to come out of the closet once he got his implants......

GOP & College said...

1) Would this be where a man-gina is aplicable?

2) This is Bob. Bob has bitch tits.

prince of leaves said...

In some of the out of the way beaches on Ibiza, it's still possible to witness the occasional mermaphrodite coming ashore for a pack of cigs.

prince of leaves said...

Jeremy was beginning to suspect that all the extra reps on the benchpress machine were making him a bit mis-proportioned.

prince of leaves said...

Spring break pranks gone awry: Brandon wasn't amused when the brothers put estrogen supplements in his Coronas, and even less so when the lifeguard insisted he go back to the hotel room and dress appropriately.

Submariner said...

Most "bro's" only come in flesh tone. Here Pat models a polk-a-dot model.

Submariner said...

V. the K. said...
If only April 1st had fallen on a Thursday. Alas, alas..."

I don't know, V. What makes you think this is a lass?