Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Tea Room of the August Moon


1. Amanda Marcotte finally finds an environment suitable to her blogging style.

2. "2/13/2007, 9:36 a.m., 1.2 pounds, brownish green with slight yellow discoloration on the edges..."

3. "I'll be out in a minute, mom," Thursday afternoons with Dwight the Troubled Teen.

4. "ORA? What the hell is an ORA?"

5. "Dear Al Gore, I'd like to tell you about my TOTAL COMMITMENT to avoiding non-recycled paper products, and why my laptop smells."

6. "... and therefore the stinking brown residue of the Bush administration should be wiped from the cheeks of America." It was always easy to tell when Sullivan was blogging from a rest area on I-95.

7. "Hey, can I help it if this is the only Wi-Fi hot spot in all Quebec?"

8. "Wow! The sh*tters on Air Pelosi are huge!"

9. Sullivan fumed. "You'd come off 'deranged' too if you had to blog while being fisted in the restroom at a Flying J truck stop."

10. Totally and hopelessly dependent on government, the young democrat emails Ted Kennedy demanding that the toilet paper in the stall be restocked immediately.

Best of The Man
Finally in Season 7, Jack Bauer comes down with a bad case of the runs and has to save the world the only way he can.

Best of Jeff
Who knew that Glenn Reynolds wore flip-flops and had such shapely hands?

Best of Submariner
"Here I sit all brokenhearted..." Leaving graffiti on a friend's My Space page just wasn't quite as satisfying as using a Sharpie.

Best of divine miss m
When multitasking goes too far.

Best of curly
“…and the rough proletariat toilet paper scraped my tender young bunghole in a manner reminiscent of Ganges Kahn.“

Best of sonicfrog
...and people called MY blog shitty...

Best of Jack Reacher
Some submissions for Microsoft's "Where will you go today" advertising campaign were immediately rejected.

Best of ThatGayConservative
"To Immodium, Soooooo when is this s'posed to kick in?"

Best of curly
As he got his porn site’s traveling web cam going, young James was both delighted and disgusted to discover that people would actually pay good money to watch him take a dump.

Best of curly
How Hillary Clinton's speech writers find their inspiration.

Best of Dwight The Troubled Teen
"Heylo and Good Afternoon. My name is Sanji Bascaravalamavindaloo, but you may call me 'Petey.' How may I help you with your technical service question today?

Best of Jonathan
"Who does Number Two work for?!?"

Hat Tip: Evariste

26 comments:

The Man said...

Finally in Season 7, Jack Bauer comes down with a bad case of the runs and has to save the world the only way he can.

Double the U said...

Wow! You can find the answers to any question on Google.

Jeff said...

Who knew that Glenn Reynolds wore flip-flops and had such shapely hands?

"Blast it - the wifi won't connect in here - why don't they have ethernet jacks in these stalls?"

The Man said...

New ad for Panasonic Tuffbook?

Rodney Dill said...

"Well the sys admin said he needed to look at a dump first."

Submariner said...

Garbage in, garbage out...

Submariner said...

"Here I sit all brokenhearted..."
Leaving graffiti on a friend's My Space page just wasn't quite as satisfying as using a Sharpie.

Submariner said...

Im teln u Rabbit - luks lik Pelosi!

Submariner said...

Dear Penthouse, I never believed your letters until this really happended to me...

Submariner said...

SOTG hides from his prom date...

divine miss m said...

When multitasking goes too far.

curly said...

“…and the rough proletariat toilet paper scraped my tender young bunghole in a manner reminiscent of Ganges Kahn.“

sonicfrog said...

...and people called MY blog shitty...

sonicfrog said...

It's the blog version of "Smell-O-Vision".

sonicfrog said...

"-ower To The -eo-le!"
"-er-endicular."
"-re-osterous!"


Ye-, she definitely squeezed that badder a little too much!

Double the U said...

Girly0710, was shocked that she didn't have to really do everything when having Cybersex.

Submariner said...

B-2? You sunk my battleship! Oh well; bombs away...

Submariner said...

Nothin,' nothin,' just sittin' aroun' pinchin' a loaf. You?

Jack Reacher said...

Some submissions for Microsoft's "Where will you go today" advertising campaign were immediately rejected.

"I am not shutting this computer down until I think of a ****ing caption!"

ThatGayConservative said...

Spellcheck: Hrnnnnnnnngggggggggahhh!!

"No. You're supposed to grip it, not type it, before you rip it!"

"To Immodium, Soooooo when is this s'posed to kick in?"

Most people grab onto the handrail.

curly said...

“…and virtual toilet paper is a dud…”

As he got his porn site’s traveling web cam going, young James was both delighted and disgusted to discover that people would actually pay good money to watch him take a dump.

curly said...

How Hillary Clinton's speech writers find their inspiration.

Submariner said...

Rosie's been stalking me ever since I was interviewed. I'm hiding in the exec's bathroom now but I think she's found me again. For the love of gawd, please send help!

Dwight The Troubled Teen said...

"Heylo and Good Afternoon.

My name is Sanji Bascaravalamavindaloo, but you may call me 'Petey.' How may I help you with your technical service question today?

That echo noise? Please hold while I check my database for a script about the sonic properties of curry farts."

Jonathan said...

Austin Powers reference: "Who does Number Two work for?!?"

divine miss m said...

At last, a public women's rest room image even more unsanitary than Britney Spears walking in barefoot.