Thursday, January 18, 2007

Looks Like Somebody's Cat's Cradle Got Out of Hand

1. Brandee never could figure out why this position was known as "Sullivan's Beagle."

2. Oh, Look, a whore!

3. "Senator Rodham told her staff to come up with 'new positions on a rack.' How's this?"

4. Slide #14 in the Middle School Presentation: "A Visit to Mr. Obgyn!"

5. "OK, Senator Kennedy. I'll wait here while you get me a glass coffee table to crap on."

6. After co-starring in 633 adult films, Honey was eminently qualified to teach "sexual variations" in Montgomery County schools.

7. "I thought she was your whore!" Bill insisted to Hillary.

8. "What do you mean Harold Ford still hasn't called?"

9. I stuck a crucifix up the ass of a pr0n model. Can I have an NEA grant?

10. "What's the matter? Haven't you ever seen a girl air out her cooter before?"

Best of Chrees
Mandy thought she had what it would take to win American Skank, but Paris was the only 'yes' vote she got. Lindsay and Britney voted against sending her to the San Fernando Valley.

Best of Submariner
Sorry Kobe; she's open but I think I'll handle this one myself...

Best of prince of leaves
"Um, no, sorry...the auditions for 'Harlot's Web' are next door..."

Best of jbinnout
I blame algore and global warming... but, it's a good thing.

Best of CJ
Playboys 'The Women of Severe Scoliosis' pictorial was the kind of thing you usually only saw in Hustler

Best of Son Of The Godfather
The Playboy mansion has the most unique bicycle racks.

Best of divine miss m
♪♪ It walks down stairs
alone or in pairs
and makes a skankity sound!
...it's Skanky, it's Skanky,
for fun it's a wonderful toy....♪♪

Best of Silhouette
Candy misunderstood when the Oscar people asked her to be a presenter.


Hat Tip: Evariste

31 comments:

Cricket said...

Mongomery Co. schools go deeper into sexual 'variation' as opposed to deviancy.

Rodney Dill said...

Ed, the marketing guy, only saved $25 dollars, but on a thong-string budget every penny counted and he'd only had to pay to tattoo the letters 'Glden Palace.'

jeff said...

This shot wasn't actually planned, but ended up being the only position in which the suit actually stayed on.

Anonymous said...

Mandy thought she had what it would take to win American Skank, but Paris was the only 'yes' vote she got. Lindsay and Britney voted against sending her to the San Fernando Valley.

curly said...

X marks the g spot.

This week on 24: Terrorist threaten the kidnapped Congressman Barney Frank with a nearly naked blonde sexpot.

Anonymous said...

This is one naughty situation I wouldn't mind untangling.

Submariner said...

ahhhhh, my FAVORITE kind of "philosopher's knot."

Submariner said...

Sorry Kobe; she's open but I think I'll handle this one myself...

Submariner said...

Arrgh, matey. Would you be int'rested in a piece o' pirate booty?

Submariner said...

Andrew awoke in a cold sweat; "My gawd, man - there was nothing there on the reach around!"

Anonymous said...

The years away from the set of 24 have not been kind for Kim Bauer.

Anonymous said...

There she is...Miss America.

Anonymous said...

Yes Muhhamed, she is one of the 72...uhh not sure about the virgin part. Probably not. Does it really matter?

Anonymous said...

"Michelle's Floor and Tile" always did a horrible job, but no one ever complained.

prince of leaves said...

"Um, no, sorry...the auditions for 'Harlot's Web' are next door..."

prince of leaves said...

Behold: the string burqini.

prince of leaves said...

Unfortunately, Brandi comes with some strings attached...

sonicfrog said...

Tic - Tac - Camel Toe!!!

jbinnout said...

Recent airing of the new Go Daddy super bowl commercial aroused quite heated and stiff debate amoung television executives.

jbinnout said...

I blame algore and global warming...it's a good thing.

jbinnout said...

Is she a natural blond? Inquiring minds...

v word... upkzzlu

divine miss m said...

ORA:

Yeah, they like rubber: shrink-tubing with a hair dryer...

CJ said...

Playboys 'Women with Severe Scoliosis' pictorial was something you usually only saw in Hustler

jeff said...

"Hey, 7 inch stilettos and this weird suit, you'd fall on your face too!"

Anonymous said...

The boys at school say this is the way everybody in Europe walks down stairs!

Occasional Reader said...

[Fatima al-Candy]: Allahu akbar...

[Muezzin]: I haven't issued the call to prayer yet, and that sure as hell ain't a burqa!

[cue laugh track]

(Source: "Everybody Loves Jihad", Season 3, ep. 2)

Son Of The Godfather said...

I've got to remember to floss more often.

Son Of The Godfather said...

The Playboy mansion has the most unique bicycle racks.

curly said...

I'm flossing.

divine miss m said...

♪♪ It walks down stairs
alone or in pairs
and makes a slinkity sound!
...it's Slinky, it's Slinky,
for fun it's a wonderful toy....♪♪

Silhouette said...

Candy misunderstood when the Oscar people asked her to be a presenter.