Saturday, November 04, 2006

Vibrant Autumn Cana


1. "Habitat for Humanity? No, we just share a construction worker fetish. Boober, shove that power drill up my ass."

2. "OK, so Rick couldn't chug a forty and walk across a roof joist. I owe you a Coke."

3. "Yeah, well they gave one to Arafat, too, so you can shove your Nobel Peace Prize up your stupid grinning, peanut-farming, terrorist-hugging, America-bashing ass."

4. Patrick Kennedy adds a liquor cabinet to his Rhode Island home.

5. All work at Habitat for Humanity stops when Jimmy Carter takes off his shirt and drinks a diet Coke - ORA

6. Arkansas --- 1990 "I tell ya, this Whitewater Thing is a gold mine, we'll be richer than... hold on, turn away from the river. It looks like Hillbitch is dumping another lesbo hooker with a big mouth, and you know what happens to witnesses."

7. "OK, so you can't play mumblety-peg with a nail-gun. I owe you a Coke."

8. "Harold Ford... Call Me?"


Best of prince of leaves
John was so startled by the flash of the camera that it made his finger twitch involuntarily. He would spend the rest of his days as Joan, the manliest transsexual lesbian residential contractor in the tri-state area.

"Don't worry boss...we'll have that old 'Welcome to Times Beach' sign down there hauled away before any prospective buyers come to visit."

Best of Rodney Dill
"Yeah, we like big decks, what of it?"

Best of ColoradoPatriot
Well, thanks for joining us! We'll see you next week on another episode of This Old Lazy Good-For-Nothing Son of Mine is Never Going to Finish This Project

Best of Submariner
Even as an adult, Scott always tried to give a little bit extra - take this deer blind for example...
Trust me; once we finish this scaffolding Sadam will swing just fine and the entire crowd'll be able to see him do so!

Best of Anonymous
In Mosul, Iraq, Mohammed the Sunni and Achmed the Shiite put aside their differences in an attempt to cooperate and build a non-denominational school, where children could be free to... hahahahaha, I tried, but I cannot even complete this sentence because I am laughing so hard.

Best of curly
"We're just waiting for the illegal aliens to show up to do the work we don't want to do."

"Sure, I know what plumb means. Why don't you shove a plumb up your ass and invite your fag friends over for a fruit salad, you scrawny twink."
Americana

14 comments:

prince of leaves said...

John was so startled by the flash of the camera that it made his finger twitch involuntarily. He would spend the rest of his days as Joan, the manliest transsexual lesbian residential contractor in the tri-state area.

prince of leaves said...

"Cindy? Yeah, well, let's just say there's no marital problem a reciprocating saw, a foundation pit, and five yards of concrete can't solve."

prince of leaves said...

"Don't worry boss...we'll have that old 'Welcome to Times Beach' sign down there hauled away before any prospective buyers come to visit."

Rodney Dill said...

"Yeah, we like big decks, what of it?"

ColoradoPatriot said...

Yet another House Nancy Pelosi shouldn't be in charge of.

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Well, thanks for joining us! We'll see you next week on another episode of This Old Lazy Good-For-Nothing Son of Mine is Never Going to Finish This Project

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Alright, he took the picture...can you puh-lease help me get this circular saw unstuck?

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Say, Hal, is that an oversized triangular level in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?

Submariner said...

Even as an adult, Scott always tried to give a little bit extra - take this deer blind for example...

Submariner said...

uhhhhh, Dad? Doesn't it kinda defeat the purpose to cut down the trees to build the house to "get away in the fall to look at the leaves?" I'm just askin...

Submariner said...

Trust me; once we finish this scaffolding Sadam will swing just fine and the entire crowd'll be able to see him do so!

Anonymous said...

In Mosul, Iraq, Mohammed the Sunni and Achmed the Shiite put aside their differences in an attempt to cooperate and build a non-denominational school, where children could be free to... hahahahaha, I tried, but I cannot even complete this sentence because I am laughing so hard.

Submariner said...

This? Just the sheep pens for Ramadan; course we're buildin' it to keep the buggerers OUT, not keep the buggeree's in...

Submariner said...

V. - just thought I'd let you know that SOTG lost a bet and had to attempt to "do" Sheehan. Photographic proof of his attempt to work up the detached state of mind required can be found at
http://www.jokeroo.com/funnypictures/beer_house.html

jeff said...

"I tell ya Bob, this gonna be the best deer blind ever. Just wait until we get that stereo system in. The deer in the park across the street aren't going to know what hit them!"

Rodney Dill said...

"Get your Binford stuck in you zipper again Cal?"

curly said...

"Of course we'll be done by next Wednesday. Ha ha ha!"

"I installed the 87 boards before I un-installed them."

"The liberal fag won't discover that the piers are only six inches deep until the big rains next spring."

"We're just waiting for the illegal aliens to show up to do the work we don't want to do."

"Sure, I know what plumb means. Why don't you shove a plumb up your ass and invite your fag friends over for a fruit salad, you scrawny twink."