Mike Stark... the parents-basement-dwelling, Hot-Pocket-swilling Kostard who disrupted a George Allen campaign event earlier this week. Politics really is Hollywood for ugly people.
1. "Now is the time on Shprockets vhen ve dance."
2. "Let me in, or I'll touch you with my baby-soft hands and doughy belly section."
3. Folk wisdom: When a whiny lib pushes his way through the kitchen door, odds are he's not gonna offer to help with the dishes.
4. "Outta my way, Fascist! I have to nuke some Velveeta and Doritos in your microwave."
5. "Outta my way, Fascist! The 'Squiggy' look-alike contest is about to start."
6. "Copping a feel as I force my pasty soft body through doorways occupied by other people is the closest thing I get to intimate human contact."
7. "Did someone say 'Free Desserts!"
8. "Hey! There are no free aluminum foil reflector beanies in here. Damn you Karl Rove!"
Best of jeff
"I gotta get out of here before I start thinking rationally!"
Best of andthenblammo!
"Boss! Change the sign from "All you can eat" to "All a normal human can eat" and we won't have this problem again!"
Best of Submariner
Now that you mention it; yes, your boobs ARE bigger'n Cindy Sheehan's...
What happens in the Avalon Manor coat closet, SHOULD stay in the Avalon Manor coat closet...
I KNOW there's mistletoe hanging there, Mirton, but we're kinda, sorta STUCK here until somebody gives one of us a push...
Best of Queequeg
Statistically, I guess it was bound to happen - a pot luck where every single family brought a dish of beans...
Best of sonicfrog
What's this?? Fraternal siamese twins???
Best of Straight8
We have to wait 'til we cross the border in to Massachusetts.
Whoa! Did you get a whif of the armpit funk on that dude back there?
Best of Frank IBC
After rubbing each others' doughy bellies together for a few minutes, foreplay would proceed to the next stage - fondling each others' hairy man-boobs.
Best of Rodney Dill
Hat Tip: Right Wing Conspirator