1. "Honey, do you really think they'll stop the war because of your hunger strike?" 2. Hillary and Bill have sure come a long way.
3. "We'll be honeymooning in her Uncle's palace on the desert planet Tattooine."
4. They met through her personals ad: SWF, 33, hobbies include grazing in the pasture, hanging out at the truck scales, and buying shoes from Al Bundy.
5. "I just don't get why your bachelor friends gave us a 50 lb bag of flour for the honeymoon."
6. "I'm not hugging you, I was sucked in by your gravitational field."
7. Sally Struthers and Chris Elliot were married Saturday in a small private ceremony in Malibu.
8. "Those tracts of open land better be the size of freakin' Montana."
9. She was a generous soul, and forgave him for calling out the wrong name durng maritals, but she would always wonder who 'Free Willy' was.
10. "Before Bertha enlightened me, I was only mildly annoyed about cancer."
Best of David Simon
"What's my motivation for this scene, Mr. Waters?"
The tequila effect will be gone, but at least his arm will be numb when he gnaws it off.
Best of Adjustah
The last known photograph of Dennis "Breast Man" Foggo before he was found dead of a "crushed pelvis".
Congratulation on this here, the day of your weddin'. Love, Uncle Dad.
Best of Van Helsing
Fortunately Bertha's drool-shawl is surprisingly absorbent.
Best of prince of leaves
"Yeah, my Jimmy's kinda dim, but he's hung like a mule and got's teeth like a garden cultivator. Rowr!"
"I said I do!" Jimmy squeaked, "Now, can you please stop torquing my basket!?"
Best of David Simon
Best of Frank IBC
Ken Lay was initially horrified at the thought of having a sex change operation, and gaining 250 pounds, (plus massive plastic surgery) but eventually he realized it was the only truly safe disguise available.
Best of Zeke
Marti married her tumor as soon as it was removed and dressed.
Best of Tomslick
16,000 yards of polyester for wedding dress.
25,000 dollars
Auntie Fayes curtain for shawl
Stolen
Plastic bouguet similar to those recently placed in cemetary.
Stolen.
Dumbass pic of Wanda May and Cletus.
Priceless.
Best of jeff
Proof that there is indeed, somewhere out there, someone for everyone.
Unfortunately, the internet is helping them find each other.
Best of sonicfrog
♫ Loving You
Is easy 'cause you're beautiful...
La La La La La (slober)
La La La La La (slober)
La La La La La
La
La
La
Laaaaaa(slober)♫
Best of jeff
Proof that there is indeed, somewhere out there, someone for everyone.
Unfortunately, the internet is helping them find each other.
Best of champaignken
Next on Bravo's Project Runway Mississippi...Cletus hopes his prom dress wins him immunity.
Jimmy Carter congratulates the new Miss Georgia.
Gay rights activists unveil their new ad campaign for gay marriage - "Are you afraid we will damage this?"
Best of Cybrludite
Say, SOTG, do you hear someone playing "Duelling Banjos"?
Hat Tip: Franklin Delano IBCevelt
27 comments:
Fodder for Andrew Sullivan.
"Honey, the chick below asked if she could borrow your mud flaps."
"What's my motivation for this scene, Mr. Waters?"
The last known photograph of Dennis "Breast Man" Foggo before he was found dead of a "crushed pelvis".
"I'm so glad we's cousins!"
Fortunately Bertha's drool-shawl is surprisingly absorbent.
"Yeah, my Jimmy's kinda dim, but he's hung like a mule and got's teeth like a garden cultivator. Rowr!"
"I said I do!" Jimmy squeaked, "Now, can you please stop torquing my basket!?"
Babelfish-Extracted Russian Captions:
"Simply ofigitel'naya wedding!"
"Stylishness and the luster!"
"IT IS SOURLY SOURLY SOUR!!!"
"I hope that these booms will be happy together."
"POINT IS PLEASANT With VASELINE"
"Chemical or nuclear range remained in the background, but obviously not far."
"[their] child can be following delirium of Pittom or Anzhelinoy Joly!"
The tequila effect will be gone, but at least his arm will be numb when he gnaws it off.
Ken Lay was initially horrified at the thought of having a sex change operation, and gaining 250 pounds, (plus massive plastic surgery) but eventually he realized it was the only truly safe disguise available.
Sometimes, what happens in Vegas follows you home.
(Not original) Signs you are at a redneck wedding.
10. Rehearsal dinner held at Hooters
9. Instead of "Friends of the bride or friends of the groom?" ushers ask "Ford Or Chevy?"
8. Bridesmaids: Pink Tube Tops
Groomsmen: Travis Tritt T-Shirts
7. Phrase "I Do" replaced by "I Heard That"
6. Tender rendition of "The Wedding Song" performed by Pinkard & Bowden
5. When the minister asks "Who giveth this woman to be married"… some guy in the back stands up and hollers "Earnhardt!"
4. Reception conversation includes the phrase, "So what have you been doing since Hee Haw, Mr. Lindsay?"
3. Snack trays at reception: Vienna sausages and Nacho Cheese Doritos
2. Plans for the honeymoon evening include tickets to the monster truck rally
….And The Number One Way To Tell If You’re At A Redneck
1. Sign in front of the church: No Shirt… No Shoes… No Problem!
Oh, dude.
http://www.sandmonkey.org/2006/07/10/disgusting-picture-of-the-day/
Uh... That might be too easy to caption.
Though his friends didn't understand, Billy knew that the only reason he stayed with Bertha was her beer flavored nipples.
-----
Raymond often cried when he remembered Buffy, but being near the woman that ate his pet and first true love gave him a sense of closeness and comfort.
---
Marti married her tumor as soon as it was removed and dressed.
---
16,000 yards of polyester for wedding dress.
25,000 dollars
Auntie Fayes curtain for shawl
Stolen
Plastic bouguet similar to those recently placed in cemetary.
Stolen.
Dumbass pic of Wanda May and Cletus.
Priceless.
Proof that there is indeed, somewhere out there, someone for everyone.
Unfortunately, the internet is helping them find each other.
It takes a strong man to make a tender chicken...
♫ Loving You
Is easy 'cause you're beautiful...
La La La La La (slober)
La La La La La (slober)
La La La La La
La
La
La
Laaaaaa(slober)♫
jeff said...
Proof that there is indeed, somewhere out there, someone for everyone.
Unfortunately, the internet is helping them find each other.
... and there making more, which is an image I'd rather not imagine!!
Ver Word: culyluyc
After my last two comments, I am more convinced than ever that I am going to Hell... and this is exactly what awaits me.
Gay or straight, I lose :-(
Forced sterilization...is it really such a bad idea?
Next on Bravo's Project Runway Mississippi...Cletus hopes his prom dress wins him immunity.
Jimmy Carter congratulates the new Miss Georgia.
Gay rights activists unveil their new ad campaign for gay marriage - "Are you afraid we will damage this?"
Great, thanks... now I no longer have to imagine the proverbial 800# gorilla loose in a bridal shop...
Or is it, "shoppe?"
Congratulation on this here, the day of your weddin'. Love, Uncle Dad.
Say, SOTG, do you hear someone playing "Duelling Banjos"?
Hey, it's all pink in the middle, right?
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