Thursday, July 20, 2006

A Gary Glitter Sandwich

1. "So, how did you guys get out of that speeding ticket in Phoenix?"

2. "Who holds your hair when you puke?"

3. "You didn't carry the three. Your Unified Field Theory is worthless! Worthless!"

4. "Farrah Fawcett made a fortune doing this. Of course, she got naked and rolled in it. Takers?"

5. "The way you let men objectify you is shameful. When I grow up, I'm gonna be a big butch professional golfer."

6. "Those are, um, really interesting swastikas Miss Argentina. Let's see if I can guess what your grandpa did during the war."


Source: Ass Press Photo/Miss Universe, Darren Decker

Hat Tip: Das Mensch

9 comments:

Submariner said...

A little lower, sweety; a little lower...

Rodney Dill said...

"I need a lot of Yellow. I want to make the French flag."

jeff said...

ORA: "Math is hard!"

"Why do you get brushes - we have to use our fingers!"

The Man said...

Miss El Salvador showed little Ariana how to cultivate a profitable cocaine trade with little money down.

Submariner said...

Now that you have the blue spread out, drop your sash and top and we'll make a fortune selling these "nipple prints" to the Gringos.

champaignken said...

Andrew Sullivan's recurrent childhood nightmare: being stuck between two beauty contestants while trying to use his glitter.

Keep your eyes down and pretend to paint, Rosie is trying to catch your eye.

prince of leaves said...

"And if you just maintain your present body weight, Maria, you can be a beauty queen when you grow up, just like us!"

prince of leaves said...

Having art time with the Miss Universe contestants was fun and all, thought Kimi, but watching Miss Argentina painting stars with her own Froot Loops breakfast vomit was a little off-putting.

Submariner said...

So; is that how they air-brushed you in Penthouse?