Wednesday, July 19, 2006

Apologies in Advance for Cap #1

1. Sucking Joe Arpaio's c**k, another job Americans won't do.

2. "Call me?"

3. "Not bad, but I'm still writing the speeding ticket. If it didn't work for Katie Couric, it sure as hell ain't gonna work for you."

4. "Thanks, but you didn't have to do that. We sell the pink prison shorts in the Tent City Gift Shop."

5. "On second thought, boss. Maybe I'll just eat those fifty eggs."

6. Illegal Immigrant Activist Elias Bermudez tries to win over Sheriff Joe Arpaio's heart by crooning Kenny Rogers's "Lady."

7. A confused reporter from KTAR 620 tries to perform an ultrasound on Sheriff Joe Arpaio.

8. While Sheriff Joe's back was turned, the Grim Reaper dispatched the FoxNews reporter and snatched his microphone.

Source: AP Photo/Matt York
Hat Tip: Brender

19 comments:

Tomslick said...

lol, #1 should be enshrined.

Submariner said...

"de plane, boss! de plane!"


V. - #'s 1 and 3 are classics.

Silhouette said...

"Just say you'll make me the happiest of men and consent to be my bride."

Submariner said...

But Sheriff Joe, I cannot reach the "low hanging fruit" to pick them...

Submariner said...

Wanna buy some peectures of your seester?

andthenblammo! said...

"So, just because you are a 'law enforcement offical', you think you have the right to enforce law? Wake up man!"

jeff said...

"I'm down on my knees, I'm beggin' ya please!"

Silhouette... you got my first idea.

andthenblammo! said...

"Alright, alright already! By the power invested in me, I dub thee 'Sir Plantsalot'! Now get back to hustling mulch, Juan, before I kick your soggy ass back across the Rio Grande!"

Submariner said...

Jay Leno's "mini-me" runs into problems in Arizona.

Submariner said...

ORA:

"I knew I shoulda taken a left at Albequerque..."

Occasional Reader said...

"I'd walk a million miles, for one a' your smiles, my Sherrrr-iffff!"

andthenblammo! said...

"Yeah, I'll say 'Sheriff don't like it!' And I got twenty deputies here to rock YOUR casbah!"

andthenblammo! said...

"*ghuuuuuur* JUST BECAUSE MY HELMET, CLOAK AND UNIFORM ARE AT THE DRY CLEANERS DOES NOT MAKE YOUR DISRESPECT ALLOWABLE! *ghuuuuur* BUT YOUR APOLOGY IS ACCEPTED! *ghuuuuur*"

andthenblammo! said...

"You in a heap a' trouble, boy!"

andthenblammo! said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
andthenblammo! said...

Look, for the last time: I meant what I said after you hired the billboard, after you hired the skywriter plane, and ESPECIALLY after you've busted into this press conference: I won't marry you. Because I'm not gay, this isn't Massachusetts, and I'm already married. To a woman. Besides, I don't believe the kid is mine, either."

prince of leaves said...

"Don't send me back, Senor Joe! I sold my legs to black market organ dealers to pay the coyote to bring me here!"

Submariner said...

My favorite hockey team? Phoenix, of course.



too obscure?

Submariner said...

Once again, Pedro; WHY did you skip your scheduled dinner with Grandma?