Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Somebody Get Dawn Some Duct Tape For Her Head

1. "Ring around the m*****f*****' rosies, pocket full of m*****f*****' posies..."

2. "The ACLU made us cancel our Christmas Pageant, so we're having a Wiccan Fertility Rite instead."

3. "There! Now all the grown-ups have been wished into the corn."

4. "Senator Byrd, What are you doing with that firehose?"

5. "Here comes Angelina Jolie. Now, look cute like chipmunks and maybe we'll get outta this dump."

6. "Oh, sorry girls, when we told you you'd be 'entertaining' some UN peacekeepers, we didn't mean with squaredancing."

7. "Crap, Star Jones just walked in. So much for our six-month supply of food."

8. "Apparently Scott Ritter, Woody Allen, and Gary Glitter all simultaneously came down with Jungle Fever."

9. "Mr. Doyle, we really like staying in your Homeland Security shelter, but Hurricane Katrina was nine months ago. Hasn't Bush stopped hating us yet?"

10. "Mrs. Gifford says break's over, get your asses back to work."

Source: AssPress/Matt Houston


Van Helsing said...

The voodoo spell left the three of them with their choice of cots. The rest of the refugees turned up at the top of a tree in Central Park.

The Man said...

Democratic operatives soon decended on the orphanage looking for voters.

The Man said...

Father's Day at Wilt Chamberlain's house was always a big affair.

Submariner said...

'Ow To Speak UNian:

jeff said...

Mom, when can we move back home to New Orleans again?

As the cots showed, there were many other children at the beginning of the game. Cujo was hungry today.

Rodney Dill said...

Soylent Green is Hobbits.

prince of leaves said...

"Mommy? Will we ever see the sky?" Five years after Hurricane Katrina, children of still-displaced evacuees live a Trantor-like existence inside the Superdome.

prince of leaves said...

The weird sisters, hand in hand,
Refugees from sea inland,
Thus do go, about, about,
Thrice to thine, and thrice to mine,
And thrice again, to make up nine.

Submariner said...

Bubble, bubble, toil and trouble.
W. hates n***a's, and made Nawlins' a rubble...

Sorry Dawn, but ya takes 'em when they presents. heh heh

sonicfrog said...

Hey, guess what.. R Kelly ax'd me out on a date!

Really? Me Too!!!

Me Too!!!

Yay! We all get to go with him. Sisters Forever!!!!

Submariner said...


♪Dad is great; give us chocolate cake!♪

Anonymous said...


Hail, hail, fire and snow. Call the angel, we will go. Faraway, for to see, Friendly Angel come to me.