Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Soccer Is Gay, I

1. ORA"Master Blaster Runs Bartertown!"

2. Sylvester Stallone's MiniMe prepares to snap the neck of another unsuspecting victim.

3. Rob Reiner and his highly unusual colostomy bag.

4. Just to be safe, it's lined with tinfoil.

5. In West Hollywood, the hankie code has gotten ridiculously complex. This man is seeking someone to perform autoerotic asphyxiation on him while dressed as Sylvester Stallone.

Best of Van Helsing
Michael Moore's skull is crushed by a patriotic demon conjured by his own guilty conscience.

Best of Son Of The Godfather
"Yeah, I see her... top row, green-flower bikini top... Dang, nice ta-ta's!"

ORA: Wayland Flowers and Madman?

Relatively new to the Witness Protection Program, Fat Tony was not familiar with the word "inconspicuous".

There are symbiotes far stranger than the Goa'uld.

Best of Submariner
Looking at the shape of the grin, methinks that he molests his hat from the side in private...

Best of Silhouette
Misunderstanding the hat requirements for his first Shriner's meeting, Bob comes to the Temple wearing a Pez.

Best of Rodney Dill
At last someone gets Zaphod Beeblebrox

It was the penis tongue puppet that really completed the ensemble.

Best of jeff
Paul Verhoerven follows up on his smash hit "Starship Troopers" with "The Puppet Masters."

Best of Occasional Reader
ORA: "Start the reactor. Free Mars."

Best of bubbalove
After years of careful cutting, pruning and shaping, Leroy finally has his skull tumor tricked out enough to allow a visit to the outside world.

Best of curly
A guy walks into the bar with a Rambo hat on his head. The bartender asks, "Hey where'd you get that?" The Rambo hat says, "It started as a small bump on my butt..."

Rambo's hemorrhoid looked just like Michael Moore.


Hat Tip: Divine Miss M
Source: Sourts Illustrated Soccer Freaks PhotoEssay

35 comments:

Rodney Dill said...

I thought aliens always popped out of your chest.

The Man said...

With fans like this, no wonder Team USA sucks.

Son Of The Godfather said...

This is your brain.
This is your brain on patriotic steroids.
Any questions?

Son Of The Godfather said...

"Hey Earl, look at that guy up there with his face painted all green... What an idiot!"

Van Helsing said...

Michael Moore's skull is crushed by a patriotic demon conjured by his own guilty conscience.

Son Of The Godfather said...

"Yeah, I see her... top row, green-flower bikini top... Dang, nice ta-ta's!"

Son Of The Godfather said...

ORA:
Wayland Flowers and Madman?

Son Of The Godfather said...

Relatively new to the Witness Protection Program, Fat Tony was not familiar with the word "inconspicuous".

Son Of The Godfather said...

DRUDGE BREAKING:
Rob Reiner felled by patriotic pimple!
Developing...

Son Of The Godfather said...

Apparently, there's also a Very Special Olympics as well.

Son Of The Godfather said...

We call this photo "Mushroom Cloud Over Mecca"

Son Of The Godfather said...

There are symbiotes far stranger than the Goa'uld.

Son Of The Godfather said...

Jingoistic Jerry always has something patriotic on his mind.

Son Of The Godfather said...

This Fall on FOX
♪ "One waves the flag, the other's a wuss
The first is for kickin' ass, the second's a puss...
But they're cousins... Siamese cousins..." ♪

Submariner said...

DRUDGEBREAKING:
Mike al'More skull-f**ked by a much more real patriot.
Developing...



Mornin' SOTG. Wayland Flowers? That's going to the archives - oh yeah! heh heh

Submariner said...

When we get back to the Holiday Inn, would you kick my balls like that?

Submariner said...

Looking at the shape of the grin, methinks that he molests his hat from the side in private...

Submariner said...

Andrew always enjoyed dressing as Rambo and dogging Mike al'Moore at sporting events.

Son Of The Godfather said...

Jerry always stood head and shoulders above the rest.

Mornin' Sub ol' buddy!

Submariner said...

Mike al'Moore, realizing that anti-American charges are cutting into his box office receipts, attempts to look like a patriot. However, he cannot resist showing his actual position on the US; he carefully arranges nearly all flags upside down.

Submariner said...

uhhhhhhh, which one is the "dummy?"

silhouette said...

"Eh, Maude says he's a nice fellar but I've always thought he was two-faced."

Silhouette said...

Misunderstanding the hat requirements for his first Shriner's meeting, Bob comes to the Temple wearing a Pez.

bad-d-d-dude said...

ROCKY VII--Even as his older, fatter, slower, whiter opponent severed Rocky's upper torso from his abdomen and placed his gory remains on his head, Rocky was hear whispering the phrase "Ain't no mo' sequels! Ain't no mo' sequels!"

Rodney Dill said...

At last someone gets Zaphod Beeblebrox

jeff said...

Paul Verhoerven follows up on his smash hit "Starship Troopers" with "The Puppet Masters."

Rodney Dill said...

It was the penis tongue puppet that really completed the ensemble.

Rodney Dill said...

"...but if I put her on my head I'd be a viking."

Occasional Reader said...

ORA: "Start the reactor. Free Mars."

Submariner said...

ORA:

I don't care what Jodie Foster said; I saw her and she fell straight through that spinning gyroscope thingamajig...

bubbalove said...

After years of careful cutting, pruning and shaping, Leroy finally has his skull tumor tricked out enough to allow a visit to the outside world.

Submariner said...

ORA:

Oh, look mommy. There's an airplane over'ead!

divine miss m said...

Submariner, did you ever wonder why we had to run for shelter when the promise of a brave new world unfurled beneath a clear blue sky? ;-)

curly said...

A guy walks into the bar with a Rambo hat on his head. The bartender asks, "Hey where'd you get that?" The Rambo hat says, "It started as a small bump on my butt..."

curly said...

Rambo's hemorrhoid looked just like Michael Moore.