1. And then, Keanu Reeves sprung forth fully formed from the loins of Zeus.
2. ORA: Quagland was Team Quahog's secret weapon.
3. Ronaldo never really adjusted to leaving the Fighting Vodafones.
4. "Look, Ronaldo, you don't have to quit me. Just let go once in a while."
5. "Cut it out. The German Angola fans are getting too excited."
6. They'll never make the front of a Wheaties box, but Special K is definitely interested.
7. "I said, 'our shoelaces seemed to be tied together!'"
8. ORA: "No! I will be the one to kick the head of Strong Bad's albino cousin."
9. "I knew it! You've been inflating it again, haven't you?"
Hat Tip: Tuff, who pre-submits
- Hey! You're not supposed to touch the balls with your hands!
- Micheal Jackon's plans to rebuild his wealth with the first annual "NeverLand Ranch Olympics" did not garner the network TV interest he had hoped.
Best of racerboy
Is this what you call a "clutch" play?
You heard the one about the Scottish footballers? Patrick Fitzgerald and Gerald Cantkeephishandsoffpatrickstesticles?
Best of jeff
Rick & Dick were forever frustrated - siamese twins, playing for different teams.
Best of Rodney Dill
Prior to this, no one had ever heard ♫ GOOOOAAAAALLLLL!!! ♫ in full soprano.
Best of The Man
Why no one wants to be Andrew Sullivan's partner for the 3-legged race.
T-Mobile wants you to reach out and touch someone.
Best of sonicfrog
I know you see mitosis occur during the growth of a human embryo, but I've never heard of it happening to an adult!
In order to get to the ball, Luis, not the brightest bulb in the hallway, tries in vain to shift Andriy into reverse.
Best of Silhouette
You can't get hair to stick up like this with just any hair gel. Thank you "There's Something About Mary."
Adam was always checking for extra customers for his parttime Mohel buisness.
Failed new Olympic combination sport: pairs figure skating and metric football.
Best of Submariner
OK! OK! I'll come with you!
٠T٠H٠E٠ Moby? No way - they both have too much hair...
"Y'know, Sven; erections lasting more than 4 hours should lead you to seeking a doctor, not a partner."
"Shut up, Juan, and answer the Vodaphone..."
Best of curly
While Vodafone aimed for the “normal” gay audience, T-Mobile’s endorsements targeted the more violently aggressive homosexuals.
Red shirt: “Sorry, man…You’d better put some ice on it!”
Yellow shirt: “Hell with that! I’m gonna see Ronaldo!”
Best of David Simon
"It's real, and it's fabulous."
"I would've appreciated the reach around a lot more last night, Manuel."
The most extreme case of a guy being led around by his dick that I've ever seen.
Best of Son Of The Godfather
"You're the asshole who keeps putting 'W' next to 'V' in the verification words so we can't tell which is which?!?... Take THAT!... Now where's that 'i' and 'j' clown at?"
Inspired by lawhawk
Until he watched World Cup action, Andrew Sullivan didn't think anything could be a bigger turn on than Abu Ghraib pics.
Source: Roto-Reuters/Damir Sagolj