Thursday, June 22, 2006

Counterpoint: Soccer Is Not Gay

1. "C'mon, smell it. You'll never guess where it's been."

2. "Is Mitch Pileggi still staring at my ass?" "'Fraid So."

3. "I don't know, that one Angola guy looks kinda hot, but he's no painted Mexican."

4. The two smelly pirate hookers rolled Captain America, left him tied up in the hotel, and went out to enjoy a lovely afternoon of soccer.

5. "You divorced your husband for that? Hell, I caught Alec doing much worse, and that was with livestock." Kim Basinger reminisces.

6. Despite the horrible accident at the lumber mill, Ashlynne bravely continued making peace signs.

Best of Son Of The Godfather
Hooray for the Red, White, and Giggidy!

"Show as much cleavage as you want, Janice... All us Republicans eventually end up in heaven anyway."

Best of Rodney Dill
"I think we scored a touchdown, now its the end of the inning."

Best of Submariner
No silly; you have to use both your both index finger AND your thumb to carry her like a six-pack...

Y'know, Daphne, after watching our boys fail to score, I'm thinking about making a "run for the border" myself...

Best of The Man
Team USA could not score against even these chicks.

Best of curly
"World cup?" "No, just C's!"

“To get the attention of a guy, do you prefer the submissive Vodafone technique or the more sadistic T-Mobile gear grab?”

“That Mexican Felipe can jump my border anytime!”

Best of andthenblammo!
This picture, and this picture alone, caused an additional 50,000 illegal aliens to crash our southern borders last night. Way to help out, Time Warner!

Best of David Simon
"Not even close, sweetie. I've been ridden by Ron Jeremy and Jeff Stryker. Guess again how many fingers will fit inside me."

"Hey Cheney, how the hell can you be falling asleep?"

"What gives, Andrew? I've never seen you get so upset at the flag being improperly displayed."

Best of sonicfrog
"Counterpoint: Soccer Is Not Gay?" Oh please. They're Lesbians!!!

Best of Van Helsing
I knew there had to be Americans out there somewhere who really care who wins a soccer game.

Best of Steve
In America... first, you get dee money.
Den you get dee POWER!
Den...you get the WOMEN, and you don't give a crap about soccer.

Best of lawhawk
Clean:
1 - the total number of goals scored by the USA in the entire tournament!
1 - the total number points scored by the USA in the World Cup this year.

---
Not so clean:
Those world cups runneth over.
I'll have what she's having.
Maybe Team USA would have done better had they seen my world cups instead of the flag.


Source: Sports Illustrated's Soccer Freak Essay. (Fair Use, you Time-Warner Pig-Dogs!)

37 comments:

Son Of The Godfather said...

Staring at her rockets, my bombs are bursting in air.

Son Of The Godfather said...

American Pies

Son Of The Godfather said...

"I dunno, Sarah, that SOTG is kinda creepy... hangin' around that caption site, waiting for the next picture... Give me ONE good reason I should go out with him... Just ONE."

*crickets*

Son Of The Godfather said...

There are laws prohobiting the wearing of the U.S. flag... It is seen as disrespectful. Here we have the best case for diplomatic immunity from those laws.

Son Of The Godfather said...

They certainly have me flying at half mast (and climbing).

Son Of The Godfather said...

"One foot-long over here please"

Son Of The Godfather said...

"Now if V the K sticks to his pattern, there'll be a real anti-Hot-Babe-Thursday pic posted right up there soon."

Son Of The Godfather said...

Hooray for the Red, White, and Giggidy!

Son Of The Godfather said...

Betsy Ross and her sister dressed in their "F"-me flags.

Son Of The Godfather said...

How can ANY (heterosexual) man look at this picture and not be for bush?

Son Of The Godfather said...

When Markos Zuniga's naked pic is flashed on the Jumbotron, Sarah confirms a length of 1 millimeter. Markos claims "shrinkage".

Son Of The Godfather said...

ORA:
"CJ, the next time you go running, try lifting only ONE foot at a time!" ;)

Son Of The Godfather said...

"Show as much cleavage as you want, Janice... All us Republicans eventually end up in heaven anyway."

Rodney Dill said...

Only one of those two players that are stuck together over here.

Rodney Dill said...

"I think we scored a touchdown, now its the end of the inning."

Submariner said...

"Sorry boys, I only do 1 at a time." AN, GO and LA were heartbroken...

Submariner said...

Let me tell you, despite my years of service, I've never felt this patriotic. I just want to go hoist the flag. Really.

Submariner said...

No, Bailey, I need to adjust both of them or you'll look "unbalanced..."

Submariner said...

Yeah, girls; the flag should be displayed on a pole, and I can help you. I'm just sayin'...

Submariner said...

No silly; you have to use both your both index finger AND your thumb to carry her like a six-pack...

The Man said...

Team USA could not score against even these chicks.

curly said...

"World cup?"
"No. C cup!"

andthenblammo! said...

This picture, and this picture alone, caused an additional 50,000 illegal aliens to crash our southern borders last night. Way to help out, Time Warner!

David Simon said...

Inspired by Submariner:

"Not even close, sweetie. I've been ridden by Ron Jeremy and Jeff Stryker. Guess again how many fingers will fit inside me."

David Simon said...

"Hey Cheney, how the hell can you be falling asleep?"

David Simon said...

"What gives, Andrew? I've never seen you get so upset at the flag being improperly displayed."

sonicfrog said...

V the K wrote: " Counterpoint: Soccer Is Not Gay"

I respond: Oh please. They're Lesbians!!!

curly said...

“To get the attention of a guy, do you prefer the submissive Vodafone technique or the more sadistic T-Mobile gear grab?”

curly said...

“That Mexican Felipe can jump my border anytime!”

Submariner said...

Y'know, Daphne, after watching our boys fail to score, I'm thinking about making a "run for the border" myself...

Submariner said...

Son Of The Godfather said...
How can ANY (heterosexual) man look at this picture and not be for bush?


They shave?

curly said...

The two blondes have a good laugh when discussing the probable impact of their boob jobs’ on the results of any penile plethysmograph tests on the three Angola fans.

Occasional Reader said...

Despite a disappointing loss to Ghana, a US soccer fan keeps up her good cheer by reminding the opposing side of the US ranking in size of economy, number of Nobel science laureates, military power, space travel...

Dwight The Troubled Teen said...

I effin' love THURSDAY!

(No caption, I just effin' LOVE THURSDAY!)

Van Helsing said...

I knew there had to be Americans out there somewhere who really care who wins a soccer game.

Anonymous said...

In America... first, you get dee money.

Den you get dee POWER!

Den...you get the WOMEN, and you don't give a crap about soccer.

Steve O

lawhawk said...

Clean:

1 - the total number of goals scored by the USA in the entire tournament!

1 - the total number points scored by the USA in the World Cup this year.

---
Not so clean:
Those world cups runneth over.
I'll have what she's having.
Maybe Team USA would have done better had they seen my world cups instead of the flag.