1. "My idea of a perfect date? Lay in an inflatable raft playing with a Game Boy. Know anybody? like that?" 2. "I am naughty. Naughty am I."
3. "Bill, Hill... there's no need to fight over me. I find you both repugnant."
4. "Really... every picture ever taken of me... with a telephoto lens? I need to leave now."
5. "Sorry to disappoint you, but I'm not the chick from 'That 70's Show.'"
Best of Son Of The Godfather
In college, I had girls like this beating on my door every day... I eventually had to let them out.
Let me guess... her "turn-ons" include: Lots of sex, video-games, pizza, and guys who spend an inordinate amount of time writing captions.
Well crap... how can a picture yell "Hey! My eyes are up here!"?
“Two spaghetti straps away from needing some extended me time in the bathroom."
Best of Capt. queeg
Assuming those are 5-pounders with a spaghetti strap diameter of 0.10 inch, the stress on each works out to about 635 psi. I conclude, therefore that they are kevlar, though I hope they are wet kite string.
Best of The Man
I went to my OBGYN and a group of short Koreans came in.
Best of What, me worry?
"Pardon me while I scratch my taut, nubile and perfect behind. I’ve been irregular ever since the illegals quit making burritos”.
Best of Submariner
Sorry, can't talk now - I'm on my way to an interview for a French Newscaster position. Think I'm overdressed?
Lifted mercilessly from Sondrak the K.
18 comments:
SOTG has an ocular migraine after squinting for "nipplage".
I'm having trouble resolving my conservative, Christian feelings with the thought of violating her in every imaginable way.
(Great, another one St.Peter gets to read back to me at the Pearly Gates ;)
In college, I had girls like this beating on my door every day... I eventually had to let them out.
Let me guess... her "turn-ons" include: Lots of sex, video-games, pizza, and guys who spend an inordinate amount of time writing captions.
Well crap... how can a picture yell "Hey! My eyes are up here!"?
We call this photo:
"Two spaghetti straps away from needing some extended me time in the bathroom."
Assuming those are 5-pounders with a spaghetti strap diameter of 0.10 inch, the stress on each works out to about 635 psi. I conclude, therefore that they are kevlar, though I hope they are wet kite string.
I been staring for hours and the damn straps keep on liftin' and separatin.' There ain't no justice in this world.
"I know they feel funny, but that's 'cause they're real."
hmmmmmm, I wonder if I could interest her in a Submariner sandwich?
I went to my OBGYN and a group of short Koreans came in.
You're giving free breast exams door to door? Sure, come on in...
Think no one would fall for it? Some geezer in FL was passing himself off as a altruististic Dr. and gave a coule before he got caught last week.
"Pardon me while I scratch my taut, nubile and perfect behind. I’ve been irregular ever since the illegals quit making burritos”.
"The capitol of Texas? That's easy: T"!
"Just because I have girlie pictures all over the walls doesn't mean I'm a lesbo. Now, where did I put my special bongo with the skin made from dried testicles? I'm supposed to be at the END SWEATS protest and I'm running late".
Sorry, can't talk now - I'm on my way to an interview for a French Newscaster position. Think I'm overdressed?
Hello darling. You're typing one handed now, aren't you?
Hmm, must be cold in here.
Au contraire, mon ami, my breasts were the model for the Hershey's Kiss...
"We aren't all smelly."
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