Wednesday, April 26, 2006
Jared Loses It
Hat Tip: CJ
Top Questions To Ask Yourself Before Buying Burger King's New Meat'Normous Sandwich.
1. How dangerous is four-digit cholesterol?
2. Am I comfortable using the word "meat'normous?"
3. Do I have $3.49 and a death wish?
4. Is that bigger than meat'gantic?
5. Does a massive coronary qualify as "having it my way?"
6. Is this gonna spoil my breakfast dessert?
7. Should I ask my doctor about Lipitor?
8. Why do I have to sign a waiver?
9. Can I get it with egg whites?
10. Did Cheney like it?
Best of Dwight the troubled Teen:
"Why the third world hates us." - Exhibit One
Best of attmay:
Is this guy gunning for Garfield the cat's job?
Best of Jonathan Leffingwell:
Andrew Sullivan was enraged upon learning that the picture of "lots of meat, brown rings, a large thumb, and sauce on the mouth" wasn't quite what he had envisioned.
Best of rodney dill:
"Dang it, I said I wanted a Diet Pepsi with this."
Best of Submariner:
Andrew Sullivan took one look at the picture and said; "I know just where to put that thumb, and I have just the thing to plug that pie-hole..."
Here at the Colon-Blow Cafe, we pride ourselves on meeting 100% of the RDA for roughage in every sandwhich.
Best of David Simon:
"I agree that a slacker slob isn't an ideal choice for our new spokesman, but he sure beats the tar out of that effeminate pedophile we used to have," explained Pepsi's CEO.
Best of (the always original) catbat:
"man, look at the way the light from the new sandwich bar reflects off my unicorn figurine collection. thumbs up."
Best of andthenblammo!:
Better keep that thumb handy, Junior, for when those onion rings start echoing along Mr. Large Intestine......
Best of cyberludite:
Hey, how'd this guy end up with my breakfast? (And what's lettuce doing on there?)
Best of T. Harris:
After cutting the kid out of view, Michael Moore had a new favorite whack-off pic.