1. It started when the school board banned "Merry Christmas..." and then just kind of snowballed.
2. "Satan! Satan! He's our man! If he can't damn your soul to the dark smoking pit of eternal torment, no one can!"
3. Some people thought burning a pentagram into the gym floor to consecrate the blood sacrifice of a freshman went a little too far, but they stopped complaining when the team went 12 - 0.
4. The Swim Team also went undefeated when every other school forfeited rather than swim in an Olympic-sized pool of human blood.
5. The image that got Marilyn Manson through those lonely nights in high school.
6. During the Tribulation, the anti-Christ will hold pep rallies to encourage those Left Behind to accept his mark.
7. The Squad from Michael Newdow High thought they were a shoo-in to win the National Cheerleading Championship until they saw the squad from Enumclaw High lead the Budweiser Clydesdales into the arena.
Best of Rodney Dill .
The 999 Girl had called in sick that day so the squad was passed over by the Carolina Panthers.
Best of Submariner .
In their next formation, the 5 in red formed a pentogram with their legs and Rosemary, the girl in white, conceived the antichrist in the apex gap between their thighs.
And in an amazing coincidence, each of our phone numbers start with 900...
Nothing to see here; just the Mohammed High Pep Squad practicing their world-famous, 9 Aisha rollover. Just move along, folks.
Best of Cybrludite .
Making fun of satanic cheerleaders trying to steal our souls. Nice. Read their story. Educate yourselves, morons.
Satanica, I wish I knew how to quit you! (WIthout having to forfit my soul, that is...)