Friday, March 24, 2006

Do the Funky Weasel

1. "And then put my arms around Saddam's shoulders, kissed him hard, and let him take me like the horny ape-man he is."

2. "Some German fellow named Dieter instructed me to dance and touch his monkey. What choice did I have?"

3. "I am bringing the noize. With the French, the funk just brings itself."

4. And then, Barney Frank woke up. But the morningwood stayed with him all day.

5. "And then I hold the Islamo-fascist's ass here and pucker up like so..."

6. "Zut Alors! My weasel sense is tingling."

7. Get with the times, chief. Nobody's "vogued" since about 1989.

8. Unlike Chef, no one found it unusual when Chirac started spouting disjointed phrases centering around graphic fantasies of paedophilia.

9. "Dig if U will the picture/Of U and I engaged in a kiss..."

10. "And then Sarkozy said, 'The Muslims are revolting,' and I said, 'Oui, but without them, the continuation of our socialist utopia is impossible.'"

Best of Son Of The Godfather
The folks at Ooops, I Crapped My Pants™ display their new ad campaign entitled "Poop Goes The Weasle".

The only thing that could make this picture any more disgusting? Mime make-up and a leotard....Oh wait, that's Galloway's shtick.

We replaced Jacque's regular decaf blend coffee with our special ebola-laced premium java... Let's see how he reacts.

Best of Cybrludite
"Zut alors! My fart, she has dislodged my Ben-Wah balls. Wait, I did not place my Ben-Wah balls in position today..."

Rumsfield creates another international incident by goosing Chriac... with a taser.

Through the use of a super high speed camera, similar to those used for photos of bullets cutting cards and such, we have captured a rare image of a Frenchman between the time he dropped his rifle and the point where he'd have his hands all the way above his head. You can also see him begining to form the word "Kamerad!"

Best of Submariner
No, no, Lebeau was actually an American playing a frog. No one believes we actually resisted...

Best of Jonathan Leffingwell
"So Michael Moore's man-boobs are out to HERE? Hmmmmmm..."

Best of Jason
Show me how the fishy eats!

Nice, a guy is trying to give a speech on how to properly make balloon animals and you guys are making fun of him. Educate yourselves, morons.

Best of David Simon
"Can someone grab my speech out of my pocket for me, so I don't ruin my manicure."

Best of attmay
Monsieur Chirac has not quite grasped the concept behind "armpit farts."

Best of Robert
Whenever I sense world problems coming my way, I just rub my nipples like this ... and my problems melt away.

Tasha sent me this.

34 comments:

Rodney Dill said...

Eventually the Director came around and saw that casting the original "Horschak" in the Welcome Back Kotter movie was a mistake.

Son Of The Godfather said...

"...and how iz eet you say in America, victory?... No, seriously, we have no word for eet een our country."

Son Of The Godfather said...

Got 'im with the ol' Altoid/Preperation H candy trick!

Son Of The Godfather said...

The folks at Ooops, I Crapped My Pants™ display their new ad campaign entitled "Poop Goes The Weasle".

Son Of The Godfather said...

"THIS is how we will deal with our unruly Muslim youth! SMOOOOOOOCH!"

Cybrludite said...

"Zut alors! My fart, she has dislodged my Ben-Wah balls. Wait, I did not place my Ben-Wah balls in position today..."

Son Of The Godfather said...

Cropped out are Jacque's handlers on either side. It's hard to stand, after all, when you have no spine.

Cybrludite said...

Rumsfield creates another international incident by goosing Chriac... with a taser.

Cybrludite said...

Another of Prouge91's many girlfriends.

Son Of The Godfather said...

The only thing that could make this picture any more disgusting?
Mime make-up and a leotard.

...Oh wait, that's Galloway's shtick.

Cybrludite said...

Through the use of a super high speed camera, similar to those used for photos of bullets cutting cards and such, we have captured a rare image of a Frenchman between the time he dropped his rifle and the point where he'd have his hands all the way above his head. You can also see him begining to form the work "Kamerad!"

Son Of The Godfather said...

We replaced Jacque's regular decaf blend coffee with our special ebola-laced premium java... Let's see how he reacts.

Cybrludite said...

Er, the word, "Kamerad!"... Oy!

Son Of The Godfather said...

They're bringing back Tales from the Crypt on HBO?

Cybrludite said...

BTW, good to see you back, SoTG!

Son Of The Godfather said...

"And once we obtain zee proper lip formation, we bend forward, thusly, to kiss zee ass of any aggressor."

(Thanks Cybr! Escaped from the psyche ward to post a few! ;)

Submariner said...

No, no, Lebeau was actually an American playing a frog. No one believes we actually resisted...


Good to see you SOTG. Thought you had actually headed out to take of the ditch-witch problem...

Son Of The Godfather said...

You should never pull out the stake. Vampires always find a way back in the sequels.

(Hey Sub! Nah, don't have that much disinfectant handy.)

radio free fred said...

"You Know How To Whistle George?"
"You just Put Your Lips Together And Blow."

Jonathan said...

"So Michael Moore's man-boobs are out to HERE? Hmmmmmm..."

Jason said...

Show me how the fishy eats!

Jason said...

Sacre bleu! My water wings! They are inflating!

Submariner said...

Yeah, yeah, the grandpa seeing the missile in the kitchen. Good impression, Jacques. Of course it would only be funny if anyone could believe there could even be a missile in a French kitchen...

Submariner said...

Non? You're kidding, right? Look, dammit; all I'm asking for is a $750,000 loan for a fixer upper in Chappaqua. And I still have employment, unlike that last guy...

Rodney Dill said...

Looks like Steve Ballmer has finally been replaced

jeff said...

..and this is what DeGaulle looked like as I squeezed his larynx shut.

David Simon said...

"Can someone grab my speech out of my pocket for me, so I don't ruin my manicure."

associatecontributor1 said...

No matter how many times Jacques Chirac's mother told him that if someone slaps you on the back when you make a face it'll stay that way he never believed her...until this one fateful day.

Jason said...

Nice, a guy is trying to give a speech on how to properly make balloon animals and you guys are making fun of him. Educate yourselves, morons.

radio free fred said...

"Le feuleur tous!"

attmay said...

Monsieur Chirac has not quite grasped the concept behind "armpit farts."

Lyn said...

So you're telling me OUI means something else in English?

Robert said...

Whenever I sense world problems coming my way, I just rub my nipples like this ... and my problems melt away.

Submariner said...

Y'know, Pauly Shore really hasn't aged well, but that "Weasel" routine still gets me...