1. The Eastside Swingers Club has been meeting every Thursday since 1969.
2. The vote was unanimous. Young people suck.
3. "Aw, screw the law. I say we all vote 'Guilty' and nail that Martha Stewart biyatch."
4. The producers of The Apprentice present a new reality series, The Wal-Mart Greeter
5. "The Sun City Residents Association... you'll never find a more wretched hive of scum and villany."
6. "All right! We were all molested by Strom Thurmond. It was highly traumatic! Leave us alone."
7. "Is that true, Earl. All of us are listed on your 'dead pool?'"
8. "Ssssh, quiet everyone... the 60 Minutes viewing party is about to begin."
Best of Lyn
The first contestants in the new reality show, Grandparent Swap.
Best of Cybrludite
Meanwhile, back in God's waiting room...
Best of the paperboy
Shocked and amazed, the residents of the Golden Sunset retirement home watched image after image from "Caption This" emerge on the computer screen. Flo, who was the only one who could read the captions blurted out "Hell in a handbasket!" and stormed out.
Best of WALSTIB
The unsuspecting wives clearly did not expect the group-wedgie the men were about to pull on them.
Best of Rodney Dill
Fred and Fannies Fabulous Flatulent Follies musical ensemble practiced for years before perfecting the 1812 Overture
"G-- D--- grandkids keep saying "im-ho-tep... Im-ho-tep..." everytime they come to visit.
Best of sonicfrog
SCOTUS - 2020!
Best of Dusty
And the sad thing is, this is only their TENTH annual high school reunion!
V the K (Riffing on Dusty and making an ORA)
"Progeria: Nature's Cruelest Joke."
Best of The Man
Here is a sample of people who do NOT watch 24 on Monday nights.
Best of Son Of The Godfather
Madge arrived home to discover an intervention stemming from her Metamucil addiction.
Kevin Bacon was tersely reminded that dancing in this town was strictly forbidden.
Interesting Lamaze class this year.