Friday, February 10, 2006

Comin' Through


1. Uber-ORA --- "All right, enough you guys. Let's just say if Curtiss were on the island, Sayid would own his ass, and if Sayid were a terrorist, Curtiss would make him his bitch. Now, stop slapping each other and just eat some cake and ice cream."

2. "I must, I must, I must increase my bust ... otherwise, I'll never be the Thursday babe."

3. "Now, now, Rosie and Ellen. No need to fight. There's plenty of me to go around."

4. "When you're a jet, you're a jet all the way..."

5. "Chillax ho's! Don't be damagin' Mack Daddy's property, or he gun have to go upside some bitches' heads."

6. "Back off, bitches! Gary Glitter is mine!"

7. "Dios Mio! What happened to your left hand, chiquita? You reach into a fryalator or something?"

8. "Hey! Guys! Stop for a minute! I'm having a hallucination that Emmanuel Lewis is giving me a direct brain massage. Does this mean I'm tripping?"

9. "All right! You're happy and you know it. Now, shut the hell up!"

10. "Hey! No activating Wonder Twin Powers at my birthday unless you're going to take the shape of presents."

Best of CJ
But soon, the girls stopped fighting and slit each other's foreheads open with cake knives and it was the best Ashura ever!

Best of T. Harris
"Step back, step back.......BOX!"

Best of Son Of The Godfather
Ever since the Rachel Corrie incident, "patty-cake" was frowned upon in the village.

"Patty-cake, patty-cake, C-4 man,
Make me a belt just as fast as you can.

Best of David Simon
No, I don't feel the baby kicking.
Why am I so angry and bitter? Mom lets you get your hair done at Andrew Sullivan Coiffure. How would you like it if you had to walk around with this bowl cut?

Best of Rufus Leaking
Stop! The lights come on the lights go off - I can't take it any more!

Best of Van Helsing
"Stop it, Fatima! Kids with leprosy should never play pattycake! You want that hand to fall off?"

Best of Rufus Leaking
Hey! Hey! Not with the left hand! Do you know where that's been?

Stop applauding! Its NOT a good thing to be one of the 72 Virgins!

Best of Jonathan Leffingwell
"Stop celebrating, dammit! That was MY BROTHER who blew up the Zionist day care center!"

"No, no, no! It is NOT good news that Scott Ritter has arrived, you idiots! Run, before that perv approaches with the Charms blowpop again!"

Best of Rodney Dill
"There is no cake/There is no ice cream/Happy Birthday!"

Best of Occasional Reader
The girls' high-fiving over being chosen as finalists in "The Prophet's Favorite Bride Competition" was abruptly interrupted by Aisha.

Best of sonicfrog
Oprah's successor in training.

From the Washington Post Best of Ought-Five collection of pictures of people they think are better than you. Fair Use! Standard disclaimer always applies.

30 comments:

Rodney Dill said...

Step aside Mo Fo!

CJ said...

But soon, the girls stopped fighting and slit each other's foreheads open with cake knives and it was the best Ashura ever!

T. Harris said...

"Step back, step back.......BOX!"

Son Of The Godfather said...

Ever since the Rachel Corrie incident, "patty-cake" was frowned upon in the village.

Rodney Dill said...

"Break it up... don't be goin' all brokeback on me now."

Rodney Dill said...

Ever since the Rachel Corrie incident, "patty-cake" was frowned upon in the village.

that one went over a little flat. Maybe you should've tread more lightly.

T. Harris said...

"Hey, hey, hey, you guys. Mommy said we're not supposed to do the "Suicide Belt Song" out in public any more."

T. Harris said...

Ever since the Rachel Corrie incident, "patty-cake" was frowned upon in the village.

that one went over a little flat. Maybe you should've tread more lightly.

I agree. It does kinda bulldoze you over.

David Simon said...

Um, hello? We're Muslims, girls. We're supposed to wear burqas and act submissive, remember?.

David Simon said...

No, I don't feel the baby kicking.

Son Of The Godfather said...

Jeeeeez looooeeez Rodney & T.Harris, you guys sure know how to drive a subject into the ground! heh.

(I'm probably going to hell for that one. Hey, if anyone wants to help me in my great movie ranking, check out my lame-assed blog!)

Rufus Leaking said...

Stop! The lights come on the lights go off - I can't take it any more!

Rufus Leaking said...

Rachel Corrie - she just did that to impress Flat Stanley!

Son Of The Godfather said...

"Patty-cake, patty-cake, C-4 man,
Make me a belt just as fast as you can.
If it "booms" to early then we won't blab,
at least we won't have to wear no stinkin' hijab.
Playing house with Ken and Barbie is swell,
But we'd rather send the infidels straight to hell.
If they mock us, we won't weep,
we'll kill the devils in their sleep."

Van Helsing said...

"Stop it, Fatima! Kids with leprosy should never play pattycake! You want that hand to fall off?"

David Simon said...

I hate being Muslim. I hate, hate, hate it. My friends rub Buddha's belly and all their wishes are granted. Me? It doesn't matter who's belly I rub; I never get sh*t.

David Simon said...

Why am I so angry and bitter? Mom lets you get your hair done at Andrew Sullivan Coiffure. How would you like it if you had to walk around with this bowl cut?

Rufus Leaking said...

Hey! Hey! Not with the left hand! Do you know where that's been?

Rufus Leaking said...

Break it up! Back in the burqa's Uncle Osamas on his way. Look miserable!

David Simon said...

Whaddya think V?

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/11219231/

Too easy?

Jonathan said...

"Stop celebrating, dammit! That was MY BROTHER who blew up the Zionist day care center!"

Jonathan said...

"No, no, no! It is NOT good news that Scott Ritter has arrived, you idiots! Run, before that perv approaches with the Charms blowpop again!"

Rodney Dill said...

Jeeeeez looooeeez Rodney & T.Harris, you guys sure know how to drive a subject into the ground! heh.

Sorta squashes the discussion.


------------------

"There is no cake,
There is no ice cream,
Happy Birthday!"

(SOTG, I think you're the only one to get those long capcha sequences, maybe to slow ya down)

V the K said...

David Simon --- If I posted that on Thursday, how many people would notice.

AM42 said...

V, that would just be too cruel!

David Simon said...

V - You have to admit, John-John even makes Sully look butch.

Occasional Reader said...

The girls' high-fiving over being chosen as finalists in "The Prophet's Favorite Bride Competition" was abruptly interrupted by Aisha.

Albertadude said...

Aisha entering the bed chamber of her husband, Muhammed!!

Rufus Leaking said...

Stop applauding! Its NOT a good thing to be one of the 72 Virgins!

sonicfrog said...

Oprah's successor in training.