Saturday, February 18, 2006

Better Late Than Never

1. The Olympic tribute to Johnny Weir flames on.

2. Steve Fawcett's next stunt: Roller-blading around the world propelled only by his ignited flatulence.

3. My favorite part was when Adam Sandler and the little kid threw the stick in front of them.

4. In the new adaptation, Romeo is rollerblader and Julius is a skateboarder; both are flaming.

5. By 2011, Muslims had rioting down to an art-form, complete with flame-spewing headgear.

Best of David Simon
Johnny Weir wanted to switch sports when he heard there were flaming guys wearing kneepads, but his enthusiasm quickly faded.

After learning his lesson the hard way, Michael Jackson dons a flame-retardant body suit for his latest Pepsi commercial.

Best of Submariner
Keep your eyes open and your flamethrowers hot boys; we're definitely in the lair of the C.H.U.D.

OK, this looks like the clot. Remember, the blood will rush like a mother once we've burned our way through, so anchor down when we get close!

Red 3; this is Red Leader. Boy, you need to get up here fast. I don't think you wearing one of these torch-head giszmo's and my eating Chi Chi's for lunch is gonna be pleasant for you if you don't...

Best of Lyn
With viewership at an all-time low, NBC finds that they are once again broadcasting 'The Olympics From Hell.'

Planet Xenon's Team Destroyer will enter the ice hockey competition . . . or else!

Oooh, brain fart.

Best of Catbat
The flaming blading jetpackheads were admonished repeatedly for viciously taunting the less fortunate performers assigned to wiggly alpine pine tree duty.

Best of sonicfrog
Never, ever feed the Oompa-Loompas after midnight!

Best of The Chainik Hocker
The Homosexual Firefighters Association of Greater Ontorio Team (HomoFAGOT) wowed the crowed at an extreme rollerblading demo in San Fransico.

Best of Silhouette
Run, Will and Holly! Run Chaka!

Best of Rodney Dill
Twizzle fizzle fo'shizzle

23 comments:

Rodney said...

I probably can't outdo these or my bottom of the barrel captions at:

http://www.outsidethebeltway.com/archives/13713

David Simon said...

Johnny Weir wanted to switch sports when he heard there were flaming guys wearing kneepads, but his enthusiasm quickly faded.

David Simon said...

After learning his lesson the hard way, Michael Jackson dons a flame-retardant body suit for his latest Pepsi commercial.

David Simon said...

Susan Powter looks even more butch in her latest workout video.

Submariner said...

ORA:

Keep your eyes open and your flamethrowers hot boys; we're definitely in the lair of the C.H.U.D.

Submariner said...

ORA:

OK, this looks like the clot. Remember, the blood will rush like a mother once we've burned our way through, so anchor down when we get close!

Submariner said...

Since there's been no "Best O's" lately, and a dearth of posts by the other two, my guess is V the K is captive somewhere around here with Prough91 and SOTG. Our job is to find and free 'em.

Submariner said...

Sullivan, Frank and Jacko finally hit on a way to sneak up on unsuspecting young men without calling attention to themselves.

Lyn said...

With viewership at an all-time low, NBC finds that they are once again broadcasting 'The Olympics From Hell.' Lyn from Bloggin' Outloud

Lyn said...

Planet Xenon's Team Destroyer will enter the ice hockey competition . . . or else!
Lyn from Bloggin' Outloud

Lyn said...

Oooh, brain fart.

Lyn said...

Oooh, I've got bad . . . cramps.

Anonymous said...

The KKK, Oslo chapter, barrels in head first on yet another church burning. Authorities remain baffeled.

catbat said...

the flaming blading jetpackheads were admonished repeatedly for viciously taunting the less fortunate performers assigned to wiggly alpine pine tree duty.

[i've searched the net over and no one in the entire world took a picture of those trees. my disappointment was slightly abated by this: http://www.olympic.org/upload/torino2006/coulisse/81_galery_big.jpg ]

sonicfrog said...

Never, ever feed the Oompa-Loompas after midnight!

Rodney Dill said...

Oh-Oh, Apolo Ohno JATO no-no.

The Chainik Hocker said...

The Homosexual Firefighters Association of Greater Ontorio Team (HomoFAGOT) wowed the crowed at an extreme rollerblading demo in San Fransico.

Rodney Dill said...

In Japan, the replacement of the flying monkeys with the frying monkeys was a much heralded success.

Chevy Rose said...

The A.D.A.Convention's last show was a big hit by demostrating "Bad Breath" after eating one Taco. Neither the Hotel nor the Fire Dept. were as amused.

Submariner said...

Red 3; this is Red Leader.
Boy, you need to get up here fast. I don't think you wearing one of these torch-head giszmo's and my eating Chi Chi's for lunch is gonna be pleasant for you if you don't...

Silhouette said...

ORA-

Run, Will and Holly! Run Chaka!

Rodney Dill said...

Twizzle fizzle fo'shizzle

Alex Stockwell said...

Bush's new plan: Make the people in blue states wear flaming hats that'll bake their brains, turning them into rednecks who'll vote for him.