1. "Hey, we're wearing shirts and shoes. We demand service."
2. "Fresh air through my privates provides temporary relief from that itching, burning yeast infection."
3. "I wish this train would go faster, or they might start the anti-abortion protest without me!"
4. "I'm auditioning for a job at Scorez. Anyone mind if I practice my pole dancing?"
5. "Nah, she doesn't do anything for me. Large men with bald spots on the other hand, Rrrrrowwwrr!"
6. "The Berkeley City Council sentenced me to six weeks community service flashing my supple young flesh to commuters who seldom get any."
7. Bjork never understood why she was arrested. She just assumed from the smell that everybody peed in the subway.
8. Another concession of the Bloomberg administration to the Transit Workers Union: bag ladies are required to be younger, better-looking, and show some skin.
9. Dang, I can't remember which Clinton advertised the internship. Well, either way, I'm dressed for success.
10. "Probably just o' them 'Metro-sexuals' ya hear so much about."
Best of jeff
Hey Bud, is it considered child pr0n when they peel in front of you on the subway?
Best of the Spambot
Do you want to find an internship in spring and summer in 2006? You can see countless internship more than any other internship job site.
Best of Cybrludite
Yeah, she's probably jail-bait, but don't complain. The next car down's "No Pants" particapant works as a Michael Moore impersonator...
The young female Chechen terrorist continued with her mission, despite the lack of a restroom to more privately retrive her supply of Semtex.
Best of Mr. Right
"Did you ever make love on a real train, Joel?"
"Hey, Paul... You better not do that here --- Oh! So that's why they called you 'Pee-Wee' Herman!"
Best of Submariner
"Dammit Jill, no daughter of mine should be dropping trou on the tube. Either strip completely or don't tease these nice folks."
See? I am a "natural brunette!"
Huh? Well just how much privacy did you think a $10 quickie would buy?
Best of The Man
Chasity's doctor informed her the rash developed because the poles on the subway were not as clean as the ones at DeJa Vu.
Best of Van Helsing
Despite her best efforts, she was unable to elicit the anonymous wedgie that had become the focus of her most intense sexual fantasies.
Best of Rodney Dill
"Well that eliminates the Camel-toe problem."
Best of Prough91
Artie was so glad he brought his pole on the commute that morning.
Jill was different. Oh yeah, she put her pants on one leg at a time like everyone else, but she didn't pull them up all the way.
Best of Jonathan Leffingwell
"Dammit, Amtrak, I wish I knew how to quit you!"
Best of Citizen Grim
With property values skyrocketing throughout New York City, strip club owners were forced to come up with creative new solutions...
Best of Rufus Leaking
Semtex? I thought you said TAMPAX!
What if you gave 'performance art' and nobody noticed?
That's not what the conductor meant when he said, 'Please use the rear door!'
From here, H/T Ace,