Thursday, January 19, 2006

Haven't You Guys Ever Read Matthew 5:27?

1. "You take dark chocolate, you mix it with white milk, and it becomes a delicious drink." --- New Orleans Mayor Ray "Willy Wonka" Nagin

2. Next event: The 200 meter breast-stroking.

3. "Senator Clinton, why do you get that dreamy, faraway look in your eye when Kennedy talks about 'waterboarding?'"

4. Suddenly, synchronized swimming... not so annoying.

5. Spike Lee's New Joint: Jungle Fever 2, a naive intern meets Ted Kennedy and a tragic ending.

6. "Oh, Xena, why do we have to be enemies?"

7. The Odyssey: Penthouse Edition: Odysseus and his crew are nearly lured to their deaths by the hot lezbo action of Circe and Calypso.

8. Justice League #457: Wonder Woman and Vixen get to know each other while Aquaman giggidies himself.

9. It got even better a few minutes later when they started "bottom-feeding."

10. Next on National Geographic Explorer, Philippe Cousteau searches for the elusive bearded clam.

Best of Submariner
Da-a-mn, Vixen! When I make you wet...

Once she had her legs, and what came with them, Ariel discovered that she wasn't nearly as interested in finding Prince Eric.

Tamika will be ok. She just landed on a 14" sea cucmber when she cannon-balled and it took us over 20 minutes to extract it. (Fought us the whole way, she did...)

Best of Rodney Dill
Brokeback Fountain - an expose on the scandalous world of women's synchronized swimming.

"C'mon you said you'd hold me up to the water jets next."

Best of Son Of The Godfather
I don't care what my little CPR class taught me... I'm switching to this chick's method.

Hmmmm... I guess being "Submariner" has it's advantages here. ;)

Best of Cybrludite
Forget Matthew 5:27, I want Marley 4:20!

Found on Knowledge Is Power. Diva-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a!

29 comments:

Submariner said...

Da-a-mn, Vixen! When I make you wet...

Submariner said...

I'll take Hillary Clinton's Daydreams for $600, Alex.

Submariner said...

The Naked News refused to cover the story. An official public statement was released indicating that the women were "...over covered already."

Submariner said...

I may not be able to define art, but I know it when I see it.

Rodney Dill said...

Brokeback Fountain - an expose on the scandalous world of women's synchronized swimming.

Rodney Dill said...

"C'mon you said you'd hold me up to the water jets next."

Submariner said...

There is a cliche in synchronized swimming circles:
"Those who can, do.
Those who can't, get done."

Submariner said...

Tonight on Touched By An Angel:
Monica saves Kathleen yet again from herself. Kathleen repays the favor by teaching Monica about a pleasure "...better than coffee..."

Son Of The Godfather said...

"Matthew 5:27"???... I don't get my sh*t together until at least midnight.

Submariner said...

Oh, and V.? Re your title - it's Hell walking around with one eye...

Son Of The Godfather said...

I often wonder what happens to racist bigots when they see a piece-of-ass chick from another race... Do they die a little inside? As for me, I'm the Captain Kirk whore who'd "do" that green Orion chick.

Son Of The Godfather said...

I don't care what my little CPR class taught me... I'm switching to this chick's method.

Son Of The Godfather said...

Hmmmm... I guess being "Submariner" has it's advantages here. ;)

Submariner said...

Welllllll, SOTG, you know what they say about how long we can hold our breath... (and it's true!)

Submariner said...

I know CPR - can I help? (myself, that is)

Son Of The Godfather said...

Yeah Sub, but "turning purple and passing out" seems like it would be a mood killer. heh

Submariner said...

Something turning purple? yes.
Passing out? nahhhh.

Submariner said...

Oh, and almost forgot:
"Submariners do it deeper."

Giggidy, giggidy

my verification word is "kiszm"

Submariner said...

Hey, Sandra, I thought in Tantric Sex you rubbed the back of the torso?

Submariner said...

A scene cut from Miss Congeniality showed Gracie Lou becoming very good friends with Miss California.

Submariner said...

ORA?

Once she had her legs, and what came with them, Ariel discovered that she wasn't nearly as interested in finding Prince Eric.

Cathy Young said...

Which episode is the Xena quote from and who says it?

Prough91 said...

Tanisha always heard if you played dead you won't get eaten.

The stars of Brokeback Ocean.

Man, V, where do you keep gettin' all these pictures of my girlfriends?

Submariner said...

Tamika will be ok. She just landed on a 14" sea cucmber when she cannon-balled and it took us over 20 minutes to extract it. (Fought us the whole way, she did...)

Cybrludite said...

Re: Matt 5:27,

It's only adultery if one of the folks involved is married to someone else. I'm single & unless these two are from Massachusetts, it's all good... (Of course, being an agnositc with pagan leanings, I'm not terribly worried in any case!)

Cybrludite said...

Forget Matthew 5:27, I want Marley 4:20!

Son Of The Godfather said...

Cybrludite said...
Forget Matthew 5:27, I want Marley 4:20!

Hey mon... This weekend's caption party at Cybr's place! I'll get the Funions and grape soda. 8)

Cybrludite said...

Y'all are more than welcome, but it might be difficult to post any captions. No internet at where I'm staying. I gotta post all this from work... (Stupid hurricanes!)

Submariner said...

The Seattle Aquarium reports an increased attendance of 650%, primarily young males. Univ. of Wash. staff are currently analyzing date to determine if the opening of "Sapphic Mermaids; Fact or Fiction" at the same time has some causality connection.