Friday, December 30, 2005

Sorry For The Gay Cowboys, Here's Bin Laden's Niece Again

1. She would soon learn why trying to seduce the tooth fairy was a complete waste of time.

2. "Now, why would my cowboy husband need to run out for pudding at 3:00 a.m.?"

3. ... Then the cheap clock radio flipped to 6:00 a.m. and began playing "I Got You Babe?" and Osama's niece woke up to face Groundhog Day again.

4. "Dear Penthouse, I am the writer of a modestly successful captioning weblog, and I never thought this would happen to me..."

5. "She's perfect!" Jake Gyllenhall gushed. "That's just exactly what I want to look like."

6. Hollywood did okay with its gay cowboy movie, but Howard Stern's movie about hot strippers coming to terms with their same-sex attractions outgrossed Titanic.

7. Throw in Angelina Jolie and some melted cheese, and you got yourself a fromage a trois.

8. You wouldn't kick that out of bed for eating crackers. Hell, she could yodel in her sleep and you wouldn't care.

Best of Rodney Dill
Looking for Mr. Good-Akbar

Best of jeff
Dear Ann Coulter, I beg to report that I have discovered the legs used by Time Magazine for their cover story on you....

Best of Van Helsing
A moment later, Osama's niece demonstrated why you should never wear spike heels on a waterbed.

Best of Divine Miss M
It would be most dishonorable for a Klingon woman to even consider smiling in the presence of a warrior.

Best of sonicfrog
...and if you want her to bad? She'll be REAL bad. Trust me. It's in her genes...

Best of Robert
Just as he undressed, she pulled the pin on her suicide bomber feather boa.

Best of Submariner
Mid-east cuisine tip: Falafel tacos.

15 comments:

Submariner said...

Why do I have this sudden desire to slide across satin into home base?

Submariner said...

I think that it would be "interesting" for her to take this Southern Baptist home for the family reunion, but hey! I'm willing to give it a try...

Submariner said...

Now that I'm both physically as well as ceremonially clean, would Submariner like to make me dirty again?

Submariner said...

V.

So nice of you to give me this Christmas present! Can I unwrap 'er now? I mean, besides mentally?

Submariner said...

'twas said before, but I just can't believe that those Islamo-fascists want to cover this in a bhurka!

Rodney Dill said...

Looking for Mr. Good-Akbar

jeff said...

Dear Ann Coulter,

I beg to report that I have discovered the legs used by Time Magazine for their cover story on you....

Van Helsing said...

A moment later, Osama's niece demonstrated why you should never wear spike heels on a waterbed.

Divine Miss M said...

It would be most dishonorable for a Klingon woman to even consider smiling in the presence of a warrior.

sonicfrog said...

...and if you want her to bad? She'll be REAL bad. Trust me. It's in her genes...

sonicfrog said...

Sex-Bot: version 3.O-sama.

Does the term "covlpoy" mean anything to you???

Robert said...

Just as he undressed, she pulled the pin on her suicide bomber feather boa.

Son Of The Godfather said...

OK, Rodney Dill... I'm gonna concede right now to the Looking For Mr. Good-Akbar cap!

Submariner said...

Mid-east cuisine tip:
Falafel tacos.

Submariner said...

Satin sheets to lie on,
Satin sheets to cry on...