1. "Oh, for crying out loud! It's only one McNugget, you fat bastards."
2. "Now, swing your partner, do-di-so... aw, crap, I should have known 'square dance therapy' would not work with an anger management group."
3. "Get a room, you guys! Honestly!"
4. "Say, is that a Bugle Boy mawashi you're wearing?"
5. "Aw, dude. You're supposed to just spritz Polo, not bathe in it."
6. "You dishonor me with your titty-twister!"
7. "First, you do your hair, then you strip down to a loincloth and wrestle a large hysterical man to the ground... but you've been to sleepovers at Andrew Sullivan's house before."
8. Two large, half-naked men caught in an embrace? Doesn't necessarily mean Sumo. This could be any truck-stop rest-room on the Pacific coast.
9. "Oh, there, there. Stop crying already. Jeez, why do you always have to be such a Mike Farrell?"
10. "Hey, slow down, stud. The condom is still wrapped around my fingers."
Best of sonicfrog
"No, I Love You More!!!"
Things get nasty at the John Belushi look-alike contest.
Best of Submariner
Shelley Winters takes offense at Rosie O'Donell's assertion that she's the biggest b!tch in Hollywierd.
I love Brian Piccolo...
Walter Hudson prepares to drop an "atomic elbow drop" on Mike al'Moore in last night's WWF Smack-Down in Elmira. But that was nothing compared to the cat-fight that broke out between Richard Simmons and Dick Gregory over who would get to market weight-loss programs for the winner.
Best of Prough91
What do you mean you forgot the flour?
Best of Van Helsing
"Gee, your hair smells terrific."
Best of Bubbalove
"Ok, I'm gonna try a reverse reach-around again but I swear to god, if you clinch your ass cheeks and break any more of my fingers, we'll never have sex again! I mean it, Michael! "
Best of Mussolini
"Psst! Does my butt look big in this th-th-th-th-thong?"
Best of Cybrludite
Dude, you're a Sumo wrestler. A house makes your butt look big!
Best of Kevin Walker
Elton John was upset when his Google Image search for "big man-on-man action" came up with this.