1. With the leather hood in place, Sgt. Brett achieved his goal of having 'the kinkiest F-16 in the whole damn Air Force.'
2. "I'm so glad AutoZone was open late. Wait 'til those low-riding putas see this plane-bra."
3. If you squat-lift a fighter jet during a fit of rage, you might be on steroids.
4. "This is for your protection, baby... Gee, where have I heard that before?"
5. You see, son, when a man and an airplane love each other very, very much.
6. "Does it feel good when I touch you there. It does, doesn't it?"
7. "Check the background. Was it mean of me to rig those French guys' ejector seats to fire on the ground?"
8. "Cats pick the damnedest places to have their kittens."
From Air Force Times Tech. Sgt. Martin Jackson / U.S. Air Force