Tuesday, November 15, 2005

Put Me In, Coach


1. "Uh, coach, is there anything you'd like to tell us about your and Tyrone's trip to Massachusetts this past weekend?"

2. "I don't understand, coach. Why are you so happy about being 'black-maled.'"

3. "Coach, explain again how daily full body cavity searches prevent steroid abuse."

4. "Dammit, Tyrone, you throw like a girl." "Well, at least I don't kiss like one, coach."

5. "Hey, did you know that the new quarterback is a ni... oh, crap."

6. Insert obvious longhorn comment.

Best of Submariner
Y'all stand back while I whip this out!

Damn, Jefferson! Hide quick - Cindy Sheehan is on her way over and looks like she has heer eyes on you.

Coach Dean: "And we're gonna drive to the 40. Then we're gonna pass to the 50! Then we're gonna run to the 20!! And then we're gonna run all the way to the BCS!!! YEEE-ARRRGH!!!!!"

Best of Whoopsey-Daisey
So tell me Jones, you ever had a reach-around from a cloven-hooved animal?

Best of WALSTIB
Coach Beavis: "Once you go black, you never go back".

15 comments:

Submariner said...

Y'all stand back while I whip this out!

Submariner said...

Coach? Whadaya mean when you say you're gonna trade me for the White Sox batboy?

Submariner said...

And the ultra obvious:

No coach, it's just my jersey number...

Whoopsey-Daisey said...

So tell me Jones, you ever had a reach-around from a cloven-hooved animal?

Anonymous said...

Coach Beavis: "Once you go black, you never go back".
-WALSTIB

Submariner said...

And if I don't make the grade in the NFL, I intend to be a professional race-baiter like the Rev. Al. So... I figure to start practising on you, coach whitey.

Submariner said...

Hey coach, damn clever how you curled your toothpcik into the Nike "swoosh." How much you gettin' for that endorsement?

Submariner said...

Yeah, yeah, I know; "practise makes perfect." But could you keep your hands to yourself when my Mom's at the game?

Submariner said...

Damn, Jefferson! Hide quick - Cindy Sheehan is on her way over and looks like she has heer eyes on you.

Submariner said...

Deer me, Jones. Deer me!

heh, heh, heh...

Submariner said...

Coach Dean: "And we're gonna drive to the 40. Then we're gonna pass to the 50! Then we're gonna run to the 20!! And then we're gonna run all the way to the BCS!!! YEEE-ARRRGH!!!!!"

Submariner said...

Back when I coached at Notre Dame I had a MS degree from a prestige school, but down here all I have to have is an Associates from an Aggie College...

Submariner said...

Damn little side-saddle kicker missed again! Anybody know if we can sign Steve Nash?

ColoradoPatriot said...

"Coach, I don't care if you're open...Call me Kobe one more time and you'll have size 11 cleats stuck in your cornbred ass!"

Submariner said...

No, seriously; don't you find it funny that your name is "White" and mine is "Black?"