Tuesday, November 08, 2005

Look at These

1. Since it doesn't look like any of these reporters are exactly 'enjoying the view,' the guy who decided to photograph her from the back probably had the right idea.

2. "Hey, wait a minute... there was a 'you'll show me yours' clause in our little agreement."

3. While she kept the press distracted, her accomplices looted their cars.

4. "OMG, her aureolas are as big as pie-plates!"

5. "... and I says to Sulzberger, 'would these change your mind?'" Maureen Dowd explains, with visual aids, exactly how she got hired at the New York Times.

6. "So, who wants some milk?"

7. "The human body is a beautiful thing? Your rolls of back cellulite beg to differ."

8. Every reporter shared the same thought. "Oh, merciful God, please don't give Cindy Sheehan any ideas!"

9. "Big deal. Even Barbara Boxer can spin her pasties in opposite directions."

10. The female reporter grimaced, flashing back to that awkward sauna incident with Senator Clinton.

Brenda Walker told me I could find it here, in this place, where I ordinarily would not go.

22 comments:

Jonathan said...

Having had no hit movies in years, Sandra Bullock was sinking to new lows to get a little media pub.

Jonathan said...

After the end of the hit show American Idol, Paula Abdul found a new career: interviewing overweight nude publicity hounds.

AM42 said...

*clears throat*
"Excuse me, but my breasts are down here."

Rufus Leaking said...

"Your gonna be playin' soccer with these things someday."

Divine Miss M said...

Mean Ol' Mr. Gravity has been particularly unkind to La Cicciolina, consequently, her U.S. campaign never really took off.

Divine Miss M said...

I don't see the two as mutually exclusive, I'd be pretty @#$%ing powerful with breasts AND bombs!

Van Helsing said...

Onlookers froze in horror. Grotesquely disfigured by a hideous disease, her left breast had been deformed into a precise replica of Ted Kennedy's face.

Tomslick said...

Shortly after viewing the luscious rolls of abdominal fat, Pop N Fresh and the Michelin Man immediatly excused themselves with full blown hard-ons.

Tomslick said...

In other news, the popularity rating of bombs have reached a new unexpected high.

AM42 said...

Reporter speaking into camera:
"There seems to be some sort of protest here at the state Capitol this morning. If you stay tuned, we'll be sure to keep you abreast of the situation."

bubbalove said...

"As you can see in the picture on this poster, last night at the New Underground Transsexual party, I had Rosie O'Donnel on this one and Ellen Degeneres on this one! Look at these bite marks! And when Hillary stepped up, I pulled up my skirt and then she did too and my God! Her's was bigger than mine!"

Son Of The Godfather said...

New CNN Poll:
Have 45-year-old hooters ever changed your political opinion?
( ) Yes
( ) No
( ) Giggidy Giggidy

[Submit Vote]

Son Of The Godfather said...

"Proposition 75?... No, I'm just here to announce the opening of our new breakfast restaurant Floppy Flapjacks down the road."

Son Of The Godfather said...

Geena Davis claims she wasn't aware the lights from the press would make her blouse see-through.

Son Of The Godfather said...

"Ma'am, what do hope to achieve by exposing your back-fat and curly red nipple hair?"

Son Of The Godfather said...

Her claim that they "are real, and they're spectacular" was met with a smattering of laughter, and at least one reporter's dry-heave regurgitation.

Son Of The Godfather said...

I don't get it... I live in California, and I don't recall seeing anything about "bombs" on the ballot. WTF?

Son Of The Godfather said...

In a counter-protest, I. Lewis Libby arrived for a "Scooter, not hooters" rally.

Son Of The Godfather said...

The looks of horror from the crowd sealed it for her. Jane Fonda would not be doing Barbarella II.

Son Of The Godfather said...

Shaking head
The things Stern makes gals do for implants...

malikrik said...

ya don't get many of these to the pound.

Submariner said...

Dammit! I need a wide-angle lens...