1. Tyrone's huge ego made it impossible for him to leave a restroom without bragging "I massively stunk up the place in there." 2. "Jeepers, Tyrone, your uniform was spotless when you went in there. What the Hell happened?"
3. "Don't go in there, Mayonnaise. Some George Michael guy was in there and said he wanted my sex, so I jammed his head into the toilet bowl and gave him the mother of all swirlies. He didn't think that was 'Too Funky.'"
4. "So, that's what made all those white girls scream."
5. "I tried to use the other one, but there's some weird English guy in there with a chick and a robot dog."
6. "Cracker? No thanks, I just ate."
7. (1972) "Thanks for getting me out of that Algebra quiz Orenthal. If there's ever anything, and I mean anything I can do to pay you back, you just call."
8. "Sorry, Tyrone, I just don't have a square to spare."
9. "Tyrone, the team asked me to talk to you about your bulimia."
10. "False Alarm Tyrone. It was just an ambulance. Can you get our stash back or is too late?"
Best of Son Of The Godfather
"Phew! Your turn, man... Be careful in there, that Maureen Dowd is a little too liberal with the teeth if ya know what I mean..."
Hollywood Trivia: Brian's Song was originally scripted about a player with Irritable Bowel Syndrome.
"Hey Tyrone, just kidding, I have my keys right here... OMG, you DIDN'T!"
"Yeah, let 'em show what I just left in there on the Jumbo-tron!"
Best of Submariner
Ain't it a bitch that this is the best home you can get for $750K here in San Francisco?
Whoooaaa, Shaquille! Looks like you aren't "the Master of Your Domain" anymore!
Son Of The Godfather inspired
"Yeah, Okay, Rosa Parks, you made your point. Not, just get your ass out of the loo so the rest of us get a chance."
Once again.
29 comments:
"Phew! Your turn, man... Be careful in there, that Maureen Dowd is a little too liberal with the teeth if ya know what I mean..."
It was actually the rapper's incontinence that earned him his name. He'd have to unexpectedly use the pay-toilets and would go around to all the other players, "Hey man, you got fitty cent? Come on, man, gimme fitty cent, quick!""
Hollywood Trivia:
Brian's Song was originally scripted about a player with Irritable Bowel Syndrome.
"Hey Tyrone, just kidding, I have my keys right here... OMG, you DIDN'T!"
"Yeah, let 'em show what I just left in there on the Jumbo-tron!"
"I realize we're a last-place team, but jeeez looeeez, can't they get us a better locker room?"
Inspired by SOTG's #3
"I loves Brian's piccolo..."
The Jaguars experienced a wide variety of difficulties due to lowered budget after a few rough seasons...
We let the dawgs out!
Woof! Woof - woof...
Y'know Ruf, the grass here sure is greener than out on the field...
Pretty damn smart hanging them over the freeway like that. But I still don't like the updraft...
"I'm SO embarrased... I walked into the woman's facilities!"
(mornin' sub!)
Steinbrenner wiped me. Who's staffing yours?
"Hey, was there a web-cam in yours?"
Whoooaaa, Shaquille! Looks like you aren't "the Master of Your Domain" anymore!
Ain't it a bitch that this is the best home you can get for $750K here in San Francisco?
"No Kevin! And don't give me any of that Rosa Parks argument either. She did NOT make a stand just to give you and I the right to use the same stall... at the same time."
I hate these Japanese efficiencies for the Kickoff Classic...
(mornin SOTG; "woman's facilities" heh!)
So THAT'S what you guys mean by a "Red Dog Blitz?"
"Seriously dude... Never buy sushi off a lunch-truck."
Hey, Rufus. I know coach was staring at your crotch in the gym, but really! Did you have to stuff him in that hole?
"I'm just sayin'... We all do the same thing... go in here and do our business... then back to the game, where we all handle the same ball. Did YOU see any sink in there? Did YOU see any soap and water?... I'm just sayin'"
(Poppi was sloppy? :)
Appropriate Blazing Saddle Quotes:
[Bart returns unexpectedly after being sentenced to death]
Charlie: "They said you was hung."
Bart: "And they was right."
and
Bart: "Excuse me while I whip this out. "
[Bart reaches into waistline as crowd gasps and screams. Bart pulls out paper]
Crowd: "Ahhhhh."
and
Jim: "Oh boys, lookee what I got heyuh."
Bart: "Hey, where the white women at."
DAMN, Tyrone! That was supposed to be Friday night LIGHTs!
Name the movie, win a kewpie doll:
"Any man loud talking spends a night in the box. You got questions, you come to me. I'm Carr, the floor walker. I'm responsible for order in here. Any man don't keep order spends a night in..."
Luke: "...the box."
Or
Dragline: "Why you got to go and say fifty eggs for? Why not thirty-five or thirty-nine?"
Luke: "I thought it was a nice round number."
"Little 'FYI', Kevin. It goes much smoother in there if you remember to remove your cup."
"That just ain't right... Their offensive lineman has a naked picture of Helen Thomas taped to the top of his helmet. There's gotta be rules, man!"
SOTG - Cool Hand Luke - I've been playing with the "eggs" scene too. You beat me to the ref.
Ho-ly sh*t, Tyrone. I never new anyone before that bought the optional Orgasmatron! Can I try it next time I got to go?
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