1. The EMT's made the mistake of saying, "Imagine this is your husband," whereupon Hillary began kicking the dummy in the chest and screaming "Die! You bastard! Die!'"
2. "He was fine until she offered him a lap dance."
3. Let's see, a female politician with presidential aspirations murders her own brother and six other people, and sends an innocent man to prison to cover up a massive campaign financing scam. Where *do* those writers on Prison Break get their ideas?
4. "Cool, just 1,998 Aztec sacrifices to go, and Quetzalcoatl will reward me with the Oval Office. Then, the blood will really start to flow."
5. "Speaking of flowing blood, anybody got a spare Tampax?"
6. Hillary's OCD would not be satisfied until every staffer's chest was buffed to a shine.
7. "Hold still, Neo, we'll have that bug out of you in a second."
8. "Bill says he wants you to position the pump 11 inches lower."
9. "Hey, if she thinks dry-humping the corpse of Abe Vigoda will give her powers over her enemies, who are we to argue?"
10. "Rosebud? Who the Hell is Rosebud? Oh, wait, he said 'Rose Law Firm.' Oops, while performing CPR I accidentally broke a rib and sent it into his heart."
A Roto-Reuters/Some Photographer Guy Photo tipped on The Corner