Saturday, November 19, 2005

Football Saturday


1. And the Earth was saved when the tiny invaders from the planet 'Auburn' landed their ship in the worst possible place and were all eaten by roided-up nose tackle.

2. Tyrone was overjoyed when the vet took the collar off and he could finally lick his balls again.

3. Unfortunately, Tyrone's taunts of 'Bring Me Your White Women' backfired badly when they played South Carolina.

4. Tyrone lifted the megaphone, and his thoughts turned to pom-poms, and pretty, pretty skirts, and he died a little more.

5. Auburn's post-game belching contests were legendary.

6. Although it would lead to firings, a lawsuit, and a brutal shower-room beatdown, Tyrone just had to shout out to the world about coach Beavis and their forbidden love.

One of several good photos emailed to me by John Schneider about a week ago. (I have epic backlog in the photos-in-the-hopper-but-not-yet-posted department).

20 comments:

catbat said...

auburn? that looks like ochre to me.

Passionate Conservative said...

still looks like some Auburn player injesting his stash of steroids with a nice "kee-an-tee.."

Tess Turbo said...

"If you're a honkey and you know it, clap your hands! (clap, clap)
If you're a honkey and you know it, clap your hands! (clap, clap)
If you're a honkey and you know it, your lack of rhythm will surely show it,
If you're a honkey and you know it, clap your hands!" (clap, clap)

DL said...

Auburn's linebacker once again won the hog calling contest!

Submariner said...

#35 - "So dad, whatcha say you, me and Uncle Elmer celebrate the win with a little canoe fishing trip down the river?"

Submariner said...

Rufus had developed a technique that amplified his on-demand projectile vomiting while visiting the opposition's sidelines.

Submariner said...

I said, "Show me your t!ts, Alabama..."

catbat said...

lip position, tyrone, lip position! and watch that fingering.

Submariner said...

Rufus lose his 1st-chair megaphone competition when he gives one final, mighty blast of a cheer and blows spit on the first 18 rows...

Son Of The Godfather said...

"Rickum, rackum, rockum, ruckum,
get that ball and really fight 'em!"

Son Of The Godfather said...

"I love jam and I love jelly!
Why them pirate hookers gotta be so smelly?"

Son Of The Godfather said...

"Anyone seen that p*ssy, Chris Mathews?... I wanna show him my perspective!"

Son Of The Godfather said...

They gotta make candy corn in special sizes for these behemoths.

Son Of The Godfather said...

SOTG hopes (from V's comment) that "hopper" isn't a euphemism for "butt".
(and what is the handyman from One Day At A Time doing sending him photos anyhow?)

Son Of The Godfather said...

"I'm big! I'm mean!
I scream like Howard Dean!
YEEEAAARRRRRGGGHHH!!"

Son Of The Godfather said...

"STELLLLAAAAAA!!"

Son Of The Godfather said...

"Sean Hannity... in pain!...
Alan Colmes is Icabod Crane!"

Son Of The Godfather said...

#33:
"Wheee-dee-dee-dee, Uh-whee-dee-dee-dee, the lion sleeps tonight..."
[pause]
Crowd:
"Uh-wheem-a-way, uh-wheem-a-way..."

Son Of The Godfather said...

It was odd seeing Leroy sing his favorite Prussian Blue songs to the crowd, but hey, who was gonna stop him?

Son Of The Godfather said...

"Oh crap. Someone please tell Jerry not to eat all the traffic cones... again."