Thursday, November 17, 2005

And Now, A Little Something For Andy and Barney

1. "Look, you can plainly see the outlines of our penises through the tight fabric of our bicycling pants."

2. This reminds me. I really need to check my electric meter.

3. "Yes. No. No. YES! No."

4. The Polish team readies themselves for the Tour-de-French-Newscaster.

5. Andrew Sullivan sighed. "I appreciate the thought, but when I said 'biker action' I meant rough men with buttless leather chaps."

6. After presenting this line-up to the rape victim, the entire squad had to take a sensitivity course.

7. "Barney Frank changed his mind. Now, he wants you all dressed as cub scouts."

8. Q. What do you get when you cross Lance Armstrong, five Tour-de-France groupies, and several hits of quality X?

9. And on Christmas morning, Andrew Sullivan trilled, "It's just what I wanted," and then began unwrapping his presents.

10. The Children's Television Workshop, makers of Sesame Street announce a new show for gay pre-schoolers, Castro Street. Brought to you today by the number 5, and the letters C and B.

Best o' Submariner
I don't know about you, Lex, but the way those cowboys keep licking their lips and muttering "Fresh pudding..." is weirding me out.

Fire Island bike messengers waiting for a package.

Best o' Son Of The Godfather
They're just one hot-French-newscaster away from having a place to hang their helmets.

"Anyone seen my bag of marbles?"

Best o' Divine Miss M
Veruca Salt, now in her 20s, disrupts the Tour de France by shouting, "But Daddy, I want one NOW!"

Best o' AlphaMu42
Tour-de-France organizers note that next year they should be a bit more specific when asking teams to submit a photo of their members.

PBS would long regret airing the Postcards from Buster episode in which the Polish Bike Team acts out the children's song "The Wheels on the Bus"

Sort of Submariner
Hey Rocky! Watch me pull a mule out of my spandex tights!

Best o' sonicfrog
I'm a lumberjack and I'm OK..."

Best o' Rodney Dill
Turn your head(s) and cough


Thanks: Divine Miss M.

31 comments:

Submariner said...

Barney decided to have Kielbasa for lunch after the race introductions...

Submariner said...

A dissapointed Andrew Sullivan looked up at the race coordinator and asked "What? No chocolate?"

Submariner said...

Fire Island bike messengers waiting for a package.

Submariner said...

I don't care what you say. I'd a rather had a cup than the helmet!

Submariner said...

I don't know about you, Lex, but the way those cowboys keep licking their lips and muttering "Fresh pudding..." is weirding me out.

Son Of The Godfather said...

"Anyone seen my bag of marbles?"

Son Of The Godfather said...

They're just one hot-French-newscaster away from having a place to hang their helmets.

E-ho said...

V the K!

did you see this?

http://www.fuckfrance.com/read.html?postid=1618425&replies=23&page=1

AM42 said...

Nice obscure (or not-so-obscure) reference with #3, V the K.

Submariner said...

The first group photo of the 2008 Polish synchronized swimming octet.

V the K said...

AM-42: I had wondered if I should have made the reference more explicit. I'm relieved that someone got it.

AM42 said...

V the K: That wouldn't be any fun : )

e-ho: I checked out that Air France photo & read through the comments. I'll have to agree that it's a photoshop... and a poor one at that. Check out the tree tops to the immediate left & right of the tail- they're identical. They didn't even bother to scale, mirror or blur the copied one.

Sorry to comment on this here. I would have commented over there, but you have to register.

Divine Miss M said...

Veruca Salt, now in her 20s, visiting relatives in Poland, and way over the Wonka candy thing, could be heard for blocks saying, "But Daddy, I want one NOW!"

Submariner said...

(inspired by AM42)

Digital Photography Daily provides an example of better use of Photo Shop, but notes that for an "excellent" rating, at least one retouch should have been enlarged to "wang-shtupper" proportions.

AM42 said...

PBS would long regret airing the Postcards from Buster episode in which the Polish Bike Team acts out the children's song "The Wheels on the Bus"

Submariner said...

Nothing to see here, folks. Just the new Euro Tele-chubbies. Please move along.

Whoopsie-Daisey said...

Oh yeah? Well I'm STILL so poor that when I wake up like this, I don't have anything to play with...

AM42 said...

Tour-de-France organizers note that next year they should be a bit more specific when asking teams to submit a photo of their members.

Submariner said...

Hey Rocky! Watch me pull a rabbit out of my spandex...

Nothing up my shorts; really.

sonicfrog said...

In the olden days, they used to test the unics by having them wear feathers.

sonicfrog said...

I'm a lumberjack and I'm OK..."

sonicfrog said...

... and the swiss team gives a hint of their chosen motif for this years sure to be exiting Porn-O-Lympics.

Submariner said...

Something was obviously lost in translation when the Soviet bobsled team showed off their new uniforms inspired by Cool Runnings while mumbling something about "less drag."

AM42 said...

As part of the new "Safe Biking" campaign, Tour-de-France participants were told to make sure that their helmets were plainly visible in all team photos.

Divine Miss M said...

There's a kielbasa joke lurking in here somewhere, but I can't quite find it.

Submariner said...

Divine Miss M -

The water was cold; COLD I tell you! Perhaps that's why you can't quite find it...

jeff said...

V the K - no problem, the reference was just right! Madeline Kahn would be proud.

Rufus Leaking said...

A whole new meaning to the words,

"Euro -weenie"

Rufus Leaking said...

Red Rocket - Red Rocket!

Rodney Dill said...

Turn your head(s) and cough

lawhawk said...

If we stand here like so, maybe none of those rioters will notice my brand new Citroen.