1. George W. Bush Doesn't Care About the Tiny People Who Live in the Folds of Corduroy Pants!2. Do Not Adjust Your Set. We Control The Horizontal. We Control the Vertical...
3. "Because Ms. O'Donnell heard that vertical stripes are slimming, now, help me cut up this circus tent."
4. "Last night, I dreamed I was a tick, on the back of a huge, anal-retentive zebra."
5. "Road Crew! It was a typo! They wanted four lanes, not forty-four lanes."
6. "Ugh! I hate the IKEA 'striped carpet and clear polyethyline furniture' room."
26 comments:
"Velcome to Sprockets, I am your host Dieter! Today we review the avant-garte movie from award-winning producer Andre Puss, entitled 'He Loves Me, He Loves My NY Yankees Fetish'!"
"Can you hear me now? NO? It's because I'm in Pinstripe HELL, that's WHY!"
Just tell your grandmother you missed dinner because you were getting high. And I mean like royally totally baked higher than you've ever been in your life high.
"What? Walk another one? Look, officer, I swear I'm sober."
"I hate it when they leave the lines up even if there's nobody waiting. Damn Six Flags!"
"Cheese. I know I left my cheese somewhere in here."
"I've got to concentrate... Must...stay...on...lines! Don't want...to fall...into abyss!"
Wow... I've heard of "eye-candy", but this is more of an "eye-sandpaper".
At night, the "Awkward-Pattern-Elves" come out and prepare Harriet Miers' new outfit for the day.
Ralph Wiggum: "It's like a fire in my pupils!"
George Foreman's got his grill, and Michael Moore's got his.
Hey, check out the sellout crowd at the Linda Rondstadt concert!
These "Where's Waldo?" things are getting pretty easy.
Dennis Kucinich at his next presidential primary.
It was unfortunate that the Berkeley protesters happened to plan their event at the same place as the world's largest drainage grate.
Man, those Sumo wrestlers really smashed the hell out of those street crossing lines!
Cool Illusions:
1) If you stare at the little person until the lines begin to fade, he seems to come out in a 3-D kind of way.
2) When you look away, you will see stripes on everything for about 5 minutes.
3) If you're working nightshift and writing silly captions and staring at this picture, and one of your crew comes in a sees you trying to blink-away the stripes now stuck in your head, it can make for a pretty embarrassing situation.
New York echo:
"Ebony, and Ivory..."
"STFU!"
"Can you hear me now? Good!"
Screech, bothered by being surrounded by "all his friends" does a quick pit-check to see if that is the problem.
Giggidy, giggidy;
You know you're my favorite hand puppet.
Yawanna?
Giggidy, giggidy...
Hey Kobe! I'm so open they must have forgotten me!
Now that I have the lines laid out, I'm ready to party with the Vikings. Yo, Daunte! Bring 'em in!
Serge, upon seeing the mock screams shrilly, "No! No! No! Vertical stripes are slimming, horizontal stripes are fattening. Diagonal stripes are just gauche..."
The flamenco dancer, suspected of being intoxicated, was asked by the Guardia "to stomp a straight line..."
"Ziggy, I'm getting some really strange readings here... Try to zero me in on Sam."
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