1. "I'll have you know I mugged a Kmart clerk for this jacket." 2. Ultimately, it wasn't criticism from the right that sank the nomination, just a few catty remarks from Mr. Blackwell.
3. "Mrs. Bush thought you might be depressed because of the criticism, so she sent you a male stripper. Wanna play with his nightstick?"
4. "Really? If your hand is bigger than your face, it means you have cancer? Let me try that." Whack!
5. "Hey, whassamatter, you mook? Don't you go talkin' 'bout my lady that way! Back off before I bust your thumbs."
6. "Paul Lynde killed himself in a jacket just exactly like that one."
7. "You know, on fashion sense alone, I'm willing to buy that you're another David Souter."
8. "I look at that jacket-scarf combo and think, somewhere, there's a pimp shivering in his air-conditioned Cadillac."
9. "I think I have the perfect accessory for that outfit, a big gold medallion that says'Money Over Bitches.'"
10. "May I presume from the guard posted outside the Vice President's office, the scent of leather and Astro-Glide, and the animal-like grunts and howls coming from inside that Cokie Roberts has dropped by for a nooner?"
Harrietmiers.blogspot.com
20 comments:
Holy shnikes, all that's missing is a big, yellow backpack and a nametag sewn into the jacket!
"And in here, you may change into something more appropriate... like someone with fashion sense."
"Did you come from Los Angeles, Ms. Miers? Oh, I'm sorry, I was just reading about the rolling blackouts there, looked at your wardrobe, and put 2 and 2 together..."
"Sometimes, when I get nervous, I clench my thumbs really tight. Then I stick them under my armpits and smell them like this..."
"This is our gem. It is the actual stuffed and mounted carcass of Terry McAuliffe. We're quite proud of that one."
Can't wait until the only thing I'm seen in public in is a BLACK ROBE!
His tie... Her scarf... I'd say e-harmony works quite well.
They thought the piece over the guard's left ear was for security reasons. It was later discovered he was listening to the Stern show when he could be heard humming "This is Beatle, I'm as bad as can, and he knows, he's the best..."
"And this is the I.W.C., or Inclimate Weather Control room we use to distract the masses."
"Nothing in my right hand, but voila! Is that YOUR watch in my left hand?"
Guard's thought bubble:
"If I just hold my hands over it, no one will know Miers gives me wood."
"Man those brownies you brought in were DEE-licious, Harriet! Hey, have you ever noticed trails when you move your hand all around?"
"If you're going to bop Ted Kennedy, don't do it with the thumb tucked in like that... do it with the back of your hand like this."
"Your table is ready, ma'am."
"I ain't joshin, Harriet! There they were, plain as day in my swimming pool... Seven little piggies! You think someone was trying to send me a message?"
"I just patted her once on the bottom, like this... Now how would you have ruled in that, uhm, "hypothetical" harassment suit?"
I am 95% certain the guy on the right is the same nazi guy who's hand got burned (and I think his face melted later) in Radiers of the Lost Ark.
He had bigger things to worry about than guarding the entrance to the football stadium. For some reason, he was the sole survivor of the train wreck... He had never even been sick a day in his life... He had to discover the truth about himself.
Both the guard and Harriet are giving international hand signals for "I have to go to the bathroom, NOW!"
"Yes it's the men's room. Trust me, you don't want to go in the ladies' room. Hillary was in there only a half hour ago."
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