Monday, September 12, 2005

Why Is This Man Laughing?

1. "I screwed up the evacuation, I didn't put any supplies in the emergency shelters, I let the streets of my city descend into chaos ... and all I have to do is whine about racism and everybody blames you. It's a beautiful thang, baby!"

2. "All right. You're huge. You win. I admit it. Now, wipe that stupid grin off your face and let's get back to the damage assessment."

3. "Am I a chick magnet? Guilty as charged."

4. Bush is skeptical, but the mayor assures him that in France, a quarter pounder with cheese is called a "Royale" with cheese. Bush agrees that that is "some crazy sh*t."

5. "So, it's settled then. First one to the tree represents the superior race. Ready, set..."

6. "Well, mom didn't really mean that about people in the Astrodome being happier that way since they were underprivileged to begin with. She's kind of 'in and out' if you know what I mean."

7. "Yeah, I know exactly what you mean, I have to deal with Governor Blanco. In and out and dumb as a bag of hammers."

8. "Sorry, Mr. President, it just cracks me up the way you mispronounce 'mo-fo.'"

Real Caption


bubbalove said...

"Yo, B. I done screwed up big. You give me a job and I'll help you punk these Democrats. Help a brutha out?

"Fo' shizzle my nizzle."


Submariner said...

"So then I says to the Governor - Watcha say Gov? Why don't we head on down to Bourbon St for a Hurricane at Pat O'Malley's?"

Van Helsing said...

"Did you see that picture of Sean Penn posing with a shotgun? Pretty macho for a left-wing Hollywood twit, huh? Now do you understand why I'm taking everyone's guns away?"

E-HO said...

#1 is the truth.

Anonymous said...

"You mean that wasn't Sean Young with the shotgun? Whew! I didn't remember her being that ugly..."

Jonathan said...

"Dammit, Ray, stop laughing! It really is pronounced 'NOOK-yeh-ler'!"

Anonymous said...

"Ray, you're the first person who got that "Roe vs. Wade" joke."


Anonymous said...

"No, Ray, I kid you not; Al Sharpton's Presidential Medal of Freedom has "There Goes The Neighborhood" engraved in Latin on it, and the dumb bastard has been wearing it ever since Carter gave it to him. Nobody's mean enough to tell him."