1. "Yeah, that's right, a freakin' Hay Maze. Jerry Seinfeld is like the cheapest date ever."
2. "I must, I must, I must increase my bust..."
3. "Oh, so mommy meant this kind of bale. I thought Daddy's meth lab got busted again."
4. "Run! Donald Trump's got a pitchfork, and he says he's going to go 'American Gothic' on our asses."
5. "Hey, it's working. Weekend-Dad is lying on the ground screaming 'My eyes! My eyes!' Let's stick some needles in the scarecrow's crotch next."
6. "Oh, look, there's that creepy Scott Ritter guy. He'll pay ten bucks if you lift up your top and let him take pictures."
7. "Don't tell me you're not the least bit creeped out that these straw bales are laid out in the form of swastikas?"
8. "Being children of the straw is okay, I guess, but those Children of the Corn really seem to be having a good time."
9. "Well, enjoy it while you can, sis. But soon, Winter will be here, and we'll have to get back to haunting The Overlook."
10. "There goes another truckload of chickens to the processing plant, where big men with huge, sharp knives slowly slit the chickens' throats and let the blood run across the floors in little rivers, blood splattering on the feathers and the men's smooth, glistening bodies, blood everywhere, blood and feathers, feathers and blood..."