Sunday, September 04, 2005

Spicoli Springs into Action

Yeah, Funny Story About This Pic.

1. "I'm used to toxic fluids leaking from holes while the thing I'm riding on goes down on me. After all, I used to be married to Madonna."

2.While it is true that rats will flee a sinking ship, some less intelligent creatures fail to do so.

3. "I swear to God if you sing the Gilligan's Island theme again I'm going to shove this right up your ass."

4. "Yaaarrrrgh! We be Spicoli and the Ass Pirates. Prepare to be boarded and surrender yar booty!"

5. "Spicoli, he's drowning! I really don't think giving him a drink is going to help."

6. Not quite a 'Ship of Fools,' more like a 'Boat of Idiots.'

7. Sean Penn's obsession with remaking The African Queen led directly to the drowning death of RuPaul.

8. "All right, Spicoli, we understand your heart will go on, and your heart is an ocean of secrets, but just come clean. Did you bang Leo DiCaprio or not?"

9. "Behold the Ass of actor Sean Penn; nobody knows whereall it's been. For fifteen years it kept its viginity; not a bad record for this vicinity." "Knock it off, Bruce."

10. "Looks like Shelley Winters didn't drown after all. Hand me the wrench."

20 comments:

SOTG said...

"OK, you pump and I'll try to throw out all the extra fluid... The BOAT you idiot!"

SOTG said...

Revealing himself to be a T-1000 terminator model from the future, Penn then morphed his hand into a transparent ice-pick to bat the scary red cup away. The one ability he did not possess was the ability to completely morph from his natural state... an asshole.

SOTG said...

"What is this shit? Water?!? These people don't need water, they need Hollywood actors down here who know all about thriving in toxic waste and sewage."

SOTG said...

Film Actors Guild to the rescue!

SOTG said...

"Don't tell me I don't know how to pilot a boat! I've been to Iraq and Iran damnit!"

SOTG said...

Rub-a-dub-dub, four pricks in a tub...

SOTG said...

Jacques pulls the bong away from Sean just long enough to show Mr.Penn "doing his part" for the cameras... Bailing out New Orleans with a magic red cup.

SOTG said...

Thought bubble of guy in background:

"I can't believe I agreed to a plan conceived by f-ing Spicoli!"

SOTG said...

His career waning, Sean decided to fund his own sequel to the critically acclaimed "Dead Man Walking".

Unfortunately, "Dumb Ass Bailing" was not as successful.

SOTG said...

Thought bubble of guy in background:

"Just one well-placed foot to the ass, and this dickwad becomes a statistic"

AM42 said...

'Boat of Idiots' LMAO!
Some great captions here V the K. Of course when you have such prime material to start with...

bubbalove said...

Sean Penn handles a technical glitch in his boat named the 'S.S. Washed-up' while shooting his latest film 'Spilligan's Island' - a story about an idiotic aging druggie movie star with delusions of grandeur that finds himself stranded in deserted New Orleans along with six Republicans.

Greta (Hooah Wife) said...

I have had the same contest going on over at http://hooahwife.blogspot.com maybe we can combine winners! Love your site and just blogrolled you. This picture is priceless!

Van Helsing said...

The last time Penn was publicly seen on his knees disposing of unwholesome fluids was in Baghdad just before Operation Iraqi Freedom got underway.

BRUISER said...

Wow ... Look Mr. Bush ... Men lend helping hands ... not deaf ears ... now take the balls out of your purse and be a man Mr. Bush ...thats right you can't as you continue to fail the American people for another one year until we take back Congress and Chimpeachment begins....

AM42 said...

bruiser... Here's 25¢

Go buy yourself a clue.

Kevin Walker said...

Who would have thought that his bladder would give out at such an unfortunate time like this? :)

SOTG said...

That's right, bruiser... If everyone would just grab a red cup and a photographer...

V the K said...

Thanks, Greta, I'll return the blogroll the next time I get off my ass and update mine.

V the K said...

P.S. One begins to suspect that 'I Am Sam' was not a big stretch for Sean Penn, acting-wise.