Wednesday, September 07, 2005

President Bush With Some Kind of Metallic Structures In The Background

1. "Preparations A through G were complete failures, but I think Preparation H feels good, on the whole."

2. "Pull your finger? In front of my solar-fusion-ignition device? That could wipe out a four-state area."

3. "Told you I could slam a six-pack, strip naked, and climb up one of those things. Now, pay up!"

4. "Hey, those Borg seemed like pretty nice fellas. Besides, their 'Assimilation Cube' will bring a lot of jobs to this area."

5. "A photo-op that looks like a 1980's Depeche Mode album cover? The Gen-Xers ought to dig that."

6. "All I wanted was a simple 'Resettlement Camp' where I could temporarily relocate my political opposition to after the coup in 2007, and you Halliburton dinguses build some freakin' Space Age Taj Mahal."

7. "Apparently, Bill Gates's House became self-aware at 2:14 a.m. Eastern Time on August 29th. Why is this a problem again? Can't we just pull the plug? Check with FEMA."

8. "They say they want 'Energon Cubes' or they'll destroy the planet. What the Hell is an 'Energon Cube?' Get FEMA on that."

9. "This is the most powerful solar generator ever built, creating enough electrocity to run an electric football game... if it's not cloudy out."

10. "'Weather Machine?' Yeah, right. 'Direct massively destructive hurricanes to any point on Earth' What a maroon! '$100 Mil or he wipes New Orleans off the map!' What kind of a sucker does he think I am?"

11. "All those billions. And all we find out is that the g*dd*mned aliens look like Jodie Foster's father! Screw that!"

Real Caption


SOTG said...

"Osama, Democrats, and now the God damned aliens want a piece of me? Here, send this message in reply... 'Bring it on, Martian a-holes!'!"

SOTG said...

"Sir, our Search for ExtraTerrestrial Intelligence has proven fruitless. We can now say without any doubt that there are NO intelligent lifeforms in the galaxy apart from our own."

Karl Rove: "Uhm, Mr.President, I have something I need to discuss with you about my origins..."

SOTG said...

The President surveys the completion of the robotic arms constructed to lift Michael Moore up, and out of the atmosphere.

SOTG said...

The plan was almost complete with the first successful test of the ALLUDIUM Q36 EXPLOSIVE SPACE MODULATOR.

"Now," thought the President, "if only those guys would show up with their butt drilling trucks, those Blue-staters will be toast!"

SOTG said...

"Anybody remember where we parked the van?"

SOTG said...

"20 billion dollars, and the only message we get is ALL THESE WORLDS ARE YOURS - EXCEPT EUROPA?!?... Why would we even care about what freakin' Europe? What a damned waste of time."

SOTG said...

"Yes sir, some well placed munitions here and here will definitely take out Air America's broadcasting abilities for good... Of course, we could just wait for Al Franken and Randi Rhoades to do that by themselves..."

Jonathan said...

"How many channels will these industrial-strength satellite dishes pick up again? 14,322? Sweet!"

Anonymous said...

Aide - "Mr. President! The Illuminati strictly forbade activation of the Doomsday robots before the appointed time!"
Bush - "Appointed time my ass! I'm gonna do some butt-kickin' 'round the world! Skull & Bones rules!"

Van Helsing said...

"Okay boys, the alien invaders have been dealt with. Now let's get out of here before the ACLU sues us on their behalf."

V the K said...

"I tell you what, those Butt Drilling guys build a HELL of a rig."

grendelkhan said...

Those are solar power generators at Sandia National Labs. They use Stirling engines full of (I believe) some sort of noncompressible hydraulic oil to turn heat into electricity. They're reportedly easy to make, and quite efficient. They're in the process of building around 20,000 of them in the California desert.

Merovign said...

So, you guys like the new movie poster for Men in Black III?