Tuesday, August 16, 2005

Ebony and Silicone


1. "Hey, for an aging has-been who dresses like a cheap whore, you're actually kind of hot." "Thanks, Anna."

2. "Anna, that's a nice dress. I wonder how it would look crumpled up on my bedroom floor... or tied around my waist, or on me."

3. "Do you realize that as a couple, we could piss off Robert Byrd AND Rick Santorum?"

4. I see a whole litter of special ed kids resulting from this arrangement.

5. Rodman offered to waive his usual stud fee in return for Anna wearing a bag over her head.

6. "So, baby, what does Trim Spa say about eating long black sausages?"

7. "Damn," Rodman thought. "I would pick today to leave the cattle prod in the Escalade."

8. I want to say she's handled more dirty sausage than Upton Sinclair, but to put a literary reference into Anna Nicole's mouth would just strain credulity too much.

9. "C'mon, baby... let me get you some first aid for that disheveled hair projection."

10. "So, basically, you and Brigitte Neilson had a cat fight over me?" he asked. "More of a death match," she answered, spitting out a piece of earlobe.

Real Caption

11 comments:

SOTG said...

OJ and Nicole in happier times.

SOTG said...

Anna and Dennis pose at the premiere for the remake of "The Thing With Two Heads", originally starring Ray Milland and Rosie Grier.

SOTG said...

"Oh yes, I see it there just over the horizon, Remulok... err... 'Dennis'... I KNEW the mothership wouldn't abandon us forever!"

SOTG said...

The unholy union resulted in a combination of the talents and genius of both parents...

A new DNC leader was born.

SOTG said...

Louis Farrakhan decides to "take a little break and just chill for awhile".

SOTG said...

How come my brain is so messed up that I am now on equal footing with Dennis Rodman?... It ain't Trim-Spa, Baby!"

SOTG said...

Continuing it's financial slump, Hollywood makes a horrible choice in it's recasting of "Gone With The Wind".

Divine Miss M said...

"Freak of nature alert! Freak of nature alert!" "How many times do I have to tell you kids: STOP STARING, they know where their problems are located."

V the K said...

The unholy union resulted in a combination of the talents and genius of both parents...

Yeah, but unfortunately, the kids inherited Anna Nicole's athletic abilities, and Dennis Rodman's ability to seduce old men.

Van Helsing said...

The Russian language has a great word that Chekhov liked to use: "poshlost." It's hard to define in English; definitions will include words like vulgar, trite, stale, tacky, crude, common, etc., but none of these words are equivalent. It's pronounced "posh lust" — and I've heard that given as a good a translation as any for what the word actually means. Maybe they should give up trying to explain what the word means in English and just put this picture in the dictionary.

Republican Michigander said...

It's actually hard to believe that Dennis Rodman was once normal back when Chuck Daly was coaching the Pistons.