Tuesday, August 16, 2005
Ebony and Silicone
1. "Hey, for an aging has-been who dresses like a cheap whore, you're actually kind of hot." "Thanks, Anna."
2. "Anna, that's a nice dress. I wonder how it would look crumpled up on my bedroom floor... or tied around my waist, or on me."
3. "Do you realize that as a couple, we could piss off Robert Byrd AND Rick Santorum?"
4. I see a whole litter of special ed kids resulting from this arrangement.
5. Rodman offered to waive his usual stud fee in return for Anna wearing a bag over her head.
6. "So, baby, what does Trim Spa say about eating long black sausages?"
7. "Damn," Rodman thought. "I would pick today to leave the cattle prod in the Escalade."
8. I want to say she's handled more dirty sausage than Upton Sinclair, but to put a literary reference into Anna Nicole's mouth would just strain credulity too much.
9. "C'mon, baby... let me get you some first aid for that disheveled hair projection."
10. "So, basically, you and Brigitte Neilson had a cat fight over me?" he asked. "More of a death match," she answered, spitting out a piece of earlobe.