Thursday, July 21, 2005
Looking for the Purple Banana 'til They Put Him in the Truck
1. "All right! Who took Mr. Hat?"
2. Sued under Truth in Advertising Laws, the Democrats were legally forced to change their name to the "National Coalition of Leftist Radicals."
3. "Not now, you naughty thing, later, in the hotel room."
4. "Oh, my God, who is that handsome man in this compact? Is it John Edwards?"
5. "This is the hand I fisted Andrew Sullivan with."
6. "And the Democratic Party wants to assure the 'Nuke Christianity and other Loser Religions' society that we share your values..."
7. "Aw, crap, the chip just turned red and started pulsating. I gotta get outta here before the Sandmen arrive." President Hillary's Social Security reforms were radical, but they kept the system solvent.
8. Hey, maybe Bush can't pronounce "Nuclear," but at least he can spell it.
9. "... All the perfumes of Arabia can not sweeten this little hand... ARRRRRRRRRRRGH!" Howard Dean's Lady MacBeth kicked ass.
10. 'Talk to the hand' is supposed to be said palm out, ya big freakin' crazy idiot.
11. "Whew, what was I drinking last night. This smells like its been in a Sumo wrestler's ass crack."
Hat tip: Brenda