Monday, July 11, 2005

Insane Clown Pussies, 1 of 2

Something to do with putting on clown make-up and protesting the G-8. How the Hell do I know what their point is? Who the Hell cares? They're clowns.

1. If John Wayne Gacy had been a left-wing icon like Mumia al-Jamal, the New York Times Magazine would have whitewashed his muderous lust for young boys into a quaint shoe fetish.

2. Al Bundy finally snaps.

3. Onlookers prayed for a skateboarder to grind down the Handicapped Access ramp and end the horrible clown's suffering once and for all.

4. In between killing sprees, Pennywise indulges his foot fetish.

5. "Am I a clown? Do I amuse you?"

6. "What do you mean there's no room in the car? There's always room in the car, dammit!"

7. As she lay face down in a pool of her own vomit, Tammy Faye wondered how much lower she could sink.

8. "...and as I lay my glazzies on that horrible smelly old clown the strains of Ludwig Van's glorious Ninth filled my gulliver, O my brothers, and I viddied myself taking a britva to his horrible smelly clown yarbles."

Hat tip: Van Helsing


Dan said...

Shrapnel the Clown has yet another 'Nam flashback...

Jonathan said...

"Stay away, man! I've got a yellow feather duster and I know how to use it!"

Van Helsing said...

Having rejected pollutant-producing cigarette butts, a budding young derelict searches for gum to chew off of the pavement.

Van Helsing

V the K said...

At one time, when we saw clowns, we thought 'Circus.' Now we see clowns, we thing 'John Wayne Gacy.' There's social commentary for ya!