Tuesday, May 24, 2005

That's My Bush!

1. "These places are so phony, don't you think?"

2. "Yes, Mrs. Bush, it was me who put blotter acid into the gerbil's water bottle. It's not as cute as Hamster Dance but it's still pretty damn funny, don't you think?"

3. "What do I want to be when I grow up? Same as every girl, a housebound baby-machine in a burlap sack churning out martyrs for the Islamist death cult."

4. "Aisha, you can grow up to be whatever you want. I don't care what your husband says."

5. "You're nice, Mrs Bush. I think I'll kill you last."

6. "Jasmine wouldn't share her crayons, so I gutted her like a fish and stuffed her in her cubbyhole."

7. "That's a lovely bomb-belt, Fatima. Did anyone else bring something for show and tell?"

8. "Yes, Mrs. Bush, they are real. And they are spectacular."

9. "Are you going to shake us down and then paw lewdly at our regular teacher like Mrs. Clinton did?"

10. "Milk and Cookies? You must be joking. On Tuesdays, we always slam a pony keg."

First lady Laura Bush sits down with students at the Om El Kora School in Alexandria, Egypt May 24, 2005. (Reuters)


Lex said...

How about this caption: Students inspect the new statue of Laura Bush, soon to be used in the Hall of the Infidels Shooting Gallery.

Anonymous said...

"Girls, I can assure you the President is not the devil he's made out to be. He's like any other man, puts his pants on one hoof at a time. Just kidding!"


Mike said...

"Mrs Bush we are going to have to ask you to stop looking at the children, your lazy eye is kind of creepy."