Friday, April 15, 2005
I am not making this up. The individuals pictured are in the business of making skin flicks and donating the proceeds to envirocauses.
I also understand from the article that in their movies these performers really, really, love nature. I mean, really, really love nature. In the physical sense.
1. The newest corollary to Godwin's Law: When Scandinavian p0rn0-stars start flashing swastikas, Europe is f*cked.
2. "Our next project is going to be an adaptation of a children's fairy tale called Hansel and Gretel and Inga and Inga's Strict Friend Ilsa."
3. Norweigan forestry experts now understood why they were seeing fewer cases of Dutch Elm disease and more cases of chlamydia in Old-Growth Norweigan forests.
4. "The Knights that Say 'Ni' demanded a shrubbery, but Inga was able make 'an arrangement' with them."
5. "You've heard of Wood Nymphs? I'm more of a Wood Nympho."
6. "Our next project will be kind of like Triumph of the Will, but with full frontal nudity and 'wokka-chikka wokka-chikka' music."
7. "Once you've had Maple, It will become your staple."
8. The real reason p0rn0graphy is so popular... you don't have to smell it.
9. If she's a typical European woman, I'm guessing her armpits could use some clear-cutting.
10. The Cult of Bob Ross takes the concept of "Happy Little Trees" to its logical extreme.