Thursday, March 03, 2005

You Can't Spell "Sore Loser" without "Soros"

LEFT-wing billionaire George Soros claims right-wing billionaire Richard Mellon Scaife is trying to smear him by posting an embarrassing story on the Internet. Soros is being sued for $6 million by a carpet installer who claims the investor's Labrador attacked him in 2004 when he came to work at Soros' Westchester estate.- NY Post




1. "Enough of your stalling. Bring me the Oscillation Overthruster!!" (And the captioner goes for the obscure reference on the very first caption.)

2. SERENITY NOW!!

3. Even a billionaire can enjoy the free and simple pleasure of autoerotic asphyxiation.

4. Soros tried to prove Bush wrong by demonstrating that he could, in fact, find his ass with both hands, but only succeeded in humiliating himself and sparking a series of embarrassing sexual harassment suits.

5. "I'm a billionaire, dammit. If I say it's at least this big, then at least this big it is!"

6. "George Bush is Hitler! Kofi Annan is Al Jolson! And I am Hedy Lamarr! And we are all on the road to Katmandu..." The World Bank found Soros's ether-induced hallucinations highly entertaining.

7. Bea Arthur testifies in support of Government-funded estrogen for post-menopausal women.

8. "Tut! Tut! Tut! No touching during the table dance, unless you want to pony up another $20."

9. "I've got the whole world/In my hands/I've got the whole wide world..."

10. "Please, please take off these handcuffs... I don't want to go to prison, I don't want to share a cell with Michael Moore, he smells..." Ah, but you've caught me daydreaming.

2 comments:

Sharon said...

V the K:"7. Bea Arthur testifies in support of Government-funded estrogen for post-menopausal women."

The resemblence is truly uncanny -
Keep up the amazingly good work!

Konservative Jay said...

I sware to God I can make that spoon bend...Just wait...Must...Concentrate...