Dustin Hoffman and Barbra Streisand (news) make the Oscar presentation for best motion picture of the year during the 77th Academy Awards (AP Photo/Kevork Djansezian)
1. "Hey, Barb, you ever thought of running for the senate?"
2. "Well, maybe there is somebody who doesn't like Sara Lee, but it apparently isn't you!"
3. "Richard Gere's gonna be really pissed when he sees you in his new Donna Karan original."
4. In the unlikely event of an wardrobe malfunction... you will never get an erection again.
5. Barbra Streisand accepts her honorary Oscar for 'Bloated Spoiled Bitch We Most Wish Would Shut the Hell up!'"
6. "Oprah has a message for you. 'Leave some canapes for the rest of us.'"
7. "I hope that gown is flame-retardant. Michael Moore's backstage with a jug of Everclear, an American flag and a Bic lighter."
8. "Thanks for the offer Barbra, but I'll just stay at the hotel. At your house, I'd just be awake all night listening to you scream at Brolin about how you can dress him up but you can't take him anyplace."
9. "Pull my finger or the Oscar goes to Marisa Tomei."
10. "Michael Moore! Hey, Love the new look... Oh, it's you, Barbra."
11. "Check out what Paris Hilton is wearing. I didn't even know they made crotchless evening gowns."